Hands of Time and Fate
by DarkDevilsAdvocate
Summary: (Blue Lions spoilers) Dimitri's life kept being taken but Byleth was determined to keep him alive. She couldn't let him die, WOULDN'T let him die. Somehow her determination to save him caused something that should not be possible. She turned back time to the day she was reunited with the Blue Lions. Post-Timeskip
1. Chapter 1

So this chapter, like my other story 'Bruises and Kisses', was something my brain insisted on.

Any chapter after this is something that I had to actually think about and put together because my brain is a douche and forced this in my mind and then basically went "That's it. I don't care about anything after that." Still, I hope you all enjoy.

-DarkDevilsAdvocate

* * *

Fhirdiad was always a little cool with the northern winds but the city was even colder during the winter month of the Guardian Moon; especially during the nights. The season had spilled thick snow haphazardly across on the roofs and ramparts of the city, piling up against buildings and encouraging people to stay indoors. The stone of the kingdom castle carried a chill readily but Byleth remained warm in bed, snuggled up against her husband under several fur-lined blankets. They were just enjoying the few moments they had with each other when they weren't busy between her duties as the Archbishop and his as the King of a unified country.

"The anniversary of Jeralt's death is coming up." Dimitri brought up in a somber tone, his hand running up and down Byleth's upper arm as they huddled against each other against the cold; each enjoying the warmth the other provided. "Are you going to return to the monestary?"

Byleth sighed and turned in Dimitri's arms until she was resting half on his chest, looking up at his face though she could hardly make it's outline in the dark. It was an old hurt but Dimitri was careful when it came to Byleth's wounds, both physical and emotional and she loved him for it. She gave him a gentle kiss to his bare chest before answering.

"I was thinking about it. I have been trying to visit his grave every year... I doubt you would want to come with me?"

"I could if I rearrange some things. I should be able to get a few days off."

"Good. I'm expecting you to use your great manly charm to keep me from becoming too depressed." Byleth's tone took on a teasing lilt as she smiled and leaned up to kiss him, laughing when Dimitri twisted so that he could flip her onto the bed, holding himself over her with a chuckle of his own.

"I think I can may-."

"Dimitri?" Byleth asked when Dimitri cut himself off as an odd surprised look came over his face. He coughed and she felt something warm and wet splatter across her face.

"By...leth..." He ground out before collapsing on her, pinning her with his greater weight. Byleth's arms automatically went around him and she felt something sticking out of his back, cutting the tip of her finger on a sharpened edge. Her breath came quickly and if her heart could beat she knew that it would be going a mile a minute; pounding against her ribs painfully.

"Damn. Missed." A menacing voice came out of the dark and she felt a presence approaching.

_No, This isn't right. This can't be. An assassin? Why? No. No. That meant that Dimitri was... That he was..._

"No. No no no no no! NO!" Power pulsed through Byleth and she felt the jerk of time changing around her. Everything reasserted itself to a minute earlier with Byleth half-laying on her living husband again.

"I could if I rearrange some things. I should be able to get a few days off."

"Someone's in the room." She hissed and Dimitri quickly moved to grab his lance, Areadbhar, that he kept nearby the bed just as she kept her sword on the other side. They both agreed that they wanted to be close to their weapons; just in case. He hadn't even hesitated at her words, he trusted her so. It was one of the reasons she loved him.

She heard the quiet sound of steel sliding through skin, chipping bone, and she watched in horror as the shadowed form that was Dimitri fall limp.

"Naughty, Naughty." The assassin's voice echoed in the dark. She could hear his mocking voice, feel him getting closer, knew that she was going to be next but she couldn't care. She was grabbing at Dimitri's body that was slowly sliding off the bed under it's own weight.

"No! No! NO!" Power coursed through her veins and again she felt the jerking motion of time rewinding.

"I could if I rearrange some things. I should be able to get a few days off."

Byleth glanced around before she rolled out of Dimitri's grasp and reached for her Sword of the Creator, ignoring the confused sound Dimitri made at her movements. She felt the slice of steel as the assassin's weapon dug into her shoulder but she ignored the feel of it as she twisted to slice out at the unknown man, forcing him back. Byleth's wound wept freely when he pulled his weapon from her as he dodged her attack. Her husband must have seen something she couldn't because she heard him shout her name and then he was in front of her, the assassin's weapon digging into his unprotected chest.

Again she rewound time. Again she tried a different method to fight of the assassin. Again Dimitri took the hit. Again, again, again.

Each time Dimitri died in her place. Each time she turned back time. Each time she tried to stop the death of her love.

She recalled Sothis gently telling her that some deaths were just meant to be after Jeralt's passing but Byleth wouldn't allow that to happen. She _couldn't_ let that happen.

So she rewound time again and again.

"I could if I rearrange some things. I should be able to get-." Byleth didn't even let him finish as she leapt desperately for her sword, unleashing it's power in a flash of crimson, and swung wildly. Her sword, as a whip, lashed out into the darkness. She heard Dimitri's cry of surprise at her sudden movements but knew that he would remain put as she thrashed about, listening to the sound of her whip-blade sparking against stone walls, splintering the wood of the wardrobe, ripping the paintings, shattering of a vase. Byleth was destroying their room but she didn't care. She heard someone outside the room shout something, she must have been making alot of noise for so late at night, and the door opened to the sound of that same person yelping as they dodged her wild swings.

After the muscles in her arm burned from the constant movement and her breathing was harsh, like she had run for miles, she slowed to a stop. She must have been a sight; sword in hand as she stared wildly into the dark that was only pierced by the flickering candlelight from the hall. Someone, Dedue she belatedly realized, entered the room now that the danger of being a victim to her sword had ended and he moved quickly to the bed to see if his King was still alright and alive. Byleth ignored their conversation, trusting in herself not to hit her beloved husband, and saw the motionless body of the assassin on the floor; a puddle of blood quickly growing under him.

"Byleth?" She heard someone call as she crossed the room to the supposedly dead body. Sorrow and despair from her constant failures to save Dimitri's life welled up, transformed into unrelenting rage, and she stabbed down at the body. Again and again. She screamed in frustrated fury so she wouldn't drown in the emotion within her, only stopping when Dimitri came to her; pulling her into his arms as he breathed soothing words to her while rubbing her back and petting her hair.

Byleth's rapid panting slowly turned to sobs as the many varied deaths she witnessed of her husband returned. She dropped her sword in a clatter and clung to him as she released all of her misery in a flood of tears.

He was here. He was alive. She had done it. She had _saved him_.

A flash of purple light appeared out of the corner of her eye and she heard both Dimitri and Dedue shout something but she was focused on was the words of the stranger that had appeared. They were quiet but somehow menacing.

"Disappointing."

"Byleth!" Dimitri screamed and he jerked her sideways, stepping into the spot where she had just been standing. She stared up at him as his eye looked down at her and his mouth moved as if he was saying something but no sound came out. A trickle of blood slipped from between his lips, dripping on her face and she watched in horror as the light of life fled his gaze. Why was the wet blood on her face so warm while Dimitri was growing so cold?

"Your Grace!" She heard Dedue shout but his voice sounded quiet and far away as she fell to her knees when Dimitri's dead weight dragged her down. She had thought she had no more tears to give, having cried herself empty earlier, but her vision blurred until she couldn't see Dimitri's paling face anymore.

Why? Why? She had killed the assassin! She had _saved him!_ Why was Dimitri still dead?! Why?!

"No. No. No. NO. NO. NO! NO! _NO!_ **_NO!_**"

Power pulsed through her, pushing outward in a violent wave. She could hear the two men still alive in the room say something but she couldn't understand them over the rushing roar of sound in her ears. Byleth could feel something different about this power as it swirled around her like storm and then her vision went dark.

* * *

"Hey! A-are you awake?"

Byleth came to on a riverbank, hair and clothes clinging to her skin in their wet state, and a stranger standing over her with a concerned expression. The man quickly moved to her side and helped her up when he noticed her trying to stand. Byleth took a few moments to gain her bearing; casting a quick glance around.

"Where am I?"

"We're in a village at the base of the monastery. What are you doing in a place like this? I honestly didn't expect to find someone floating away down the river..."

Something wasn't right. She was obviously no longer in the bedroom she shared with Dimitri in Fhirdiad and though this man was a stranger his words and face held a familiarity that Byleth couldn't quite place.

"Garreg Mach is upstream of here, but that place was abandoned." The man continued, oblivious to Byleth's confusion.

"What do you mean?" Garreg Mach? She couldn't have been that close. She had been in Faerghus for a while. Even if she had managed to push her abilities to their furthest and drained herself to the point of near death she would only have been able to go back a day, maybe two, not far enough to put her in a time near the monastery.

"You don't know? The Church of Seiros isn't there anymore." No. That couldn't be right. She was the Archbishop and, though the Church had changed under the reforms that she had implemented with the help of the others, it was still very much around. There was only one other explanation but there was no way she could be where and when she was beginning to think she was. "Though there have been some folks still living there in the five years since... Well, you know. Anyway, I've heard some thieves have been spotted around those parts these days."

Five years? It couldn't be that time. No, that was _impossible_. She didn't have the power to do something like this. She had just wanted to save Dimitri. There was no way she could have pushed herself back so far. Even if she_ could,_ there was no way she could do so after the many resets she had gone through previously, trying to keep Dimitri alive.

"What year is it?"

"Um, are you feeling all right? You didn't hit your head or anything, did you? It's the Ethereal Moon of the year 1185. It's been nearly five years since the moastery fell. Tomorrow was supposed to be the millennium festival, but who's got time to think about things like that?"

"The millennium festival..."

Byleth could feel the breath leave her like she had been struck hard as she tried to wrap her mind around what had happened. Somehow, in some impossible chance, she had forced herself back to after she had woken up in the midst of the war. It couldn't be possible but here she was. She had somehow turned back the hands of time several _years_. Garreg Mach would be in ruins and everyone would be at war.

"Uh, yeah, that's what I said. But with the war and the Archbishop still missing and all... I doubt there's a soul to be found who has enough blessings worth counting." The stranger man answered; oblivious to the fact that she was no longer listening. Byleth turned in the direction of the monastery. She already knew the way. She had been on this path before.

"Hey! Slow down, will ya? Where do you think you're going?"

"The monastery."

"Are you crazy?! I told ya! They say thieves are running amok up there, and there's plenty of other dangers too. I heard a rumor that Imperial troops went up there to investigate and got slaughtered. Every last one! Come on, I promise I won't say you're a coward. Just forget about going anywhere near the monastery." The villager exclaimed, trying to keep her from walking to what he thought was certain death. She knew that he was only worried about her, not knowing who she was, but she couldn't _not_ go. Byleth shook her head. She knew she had to go. Otherwise everything would be lost. The future that was hers would be lost.

"You just remember I tried to stop you, got it? It's not on my conscience if you wind up dead!"

"No need to worry about me." She knew what she was going to find. She knew she would be able to take any bandits that came at her but she also knew that she wouldn't be fighting those bandits alone. Still she didn't relish what, or who rather, she was going to find. Byleth didn't want to see him like that again but knew that she would have to. She couldn't leave him to wallow in his own madness. She _would_ save him.


	2. Chapter 2

So here's the first chapter that wasn't just given to me by my stupid brain.

The events will follow the Blue Lion route for a bit but there will be changes to some conversations due to the nature of the story. Right now, the changes will be small but as the story goes on the changes will get larger and larger until Byleth doesn't know what will happen.

If a conversation comes across as OOC, let me know and how it would fit the character better. I want to keep as true to these characters as possible. Enjoy.

-DarkDevilsAdvocate

* * *

Byleth walked up the stairs slowly, stepping over the dead bodies of countless imperial soldiers, numb to the visceral images surrounding her. Her steps were heavy as she tried not to think about what she would find at the top of the stairs. She wasn't going to stop. Even if she had to deal with his hatred and his cold attitude she would find some way to save him. She would save him from himself and she would save him from all their enemies.

She stepped into the dawning light of the new day. Predictably she found him leaning against the far wall, hiding in shadow. She moved closer to him and he looked up, watching her progress until she stopped before him, reaching her hand out to him, despite knowing that he would only turn away from her.

"I should've known... that one day... you would be haunting me as well. You... What must I do to be rid of you?" He asked as he pushed off the wall to stand to his full height. She remembered being surprised at how much taller he had grown, towering over her, but now she had grown so used to his height, to how her body fit perfectly against his that it no longer intimidated her. "I will kill that woman, I swear it. Do not look at me with scorn in your eyes!"

Byleth had been so confused by his words last time she had stood here and had asked him what he was talking about. She didn't need to this time. She knew of the madness, of the voices that whispered in his ears, of the specters that haunted him.

"Everything will be OK." She told him; desperately wanting to pull him to her, to hold him and soothe his worries like he had done for her before. Or perhaps it should be like he would do in the future? It was too confusing. Byleth had never turned back time so far before. She had never dealt with the consequences of changing a future she had seen beyond a few seconds.

She stepped closer to him but paused, forcing herself to remember that this Dimitri was not her Dimitri. Not yet. He wouldn't welcome her unwanted touch. At best he would push her away and at worse she would have a lance through her stomach. Instead she looked up at his surprised expression with a sad one of her own.

"You... It can't be? You're alive?! Hmph. If that is the case...That can only mean you are another Imperial spy. Did you come here to kill me?" Of course he would think like that. The only people he had dealt with the past several years had been people trying to take his life. Any trust he used to have was shattered and she knew that she would be spending the next few months piecing it back together so that he could return to being a virtuous man. His suspicion was understandable. It was the only thing he could think of for her continued survival. "Answer the question."

"Of course not." Byleth would never want to hurt him but knew that she wouldn't have his trust for many months more. Dimitri scoffed and walked past her as if to leave her there, pausing for a moment when she spoke.

"I'm glad you're safe."

"Am I?"

He didn't say anything else as he went down the stairs, leaving Byleth to follow him towards the cathedral. He stopped, his back still to her, and waited. They both stood there in silence as she tried to think of what to say to break the silence. She knew what she had asked last time, about the five years they had been apart, about how he had said he had been essentially dead, and her asking about why he would say such things. She didn't need to ask those now. She knew the answers already.

"I'm sorry." She apologized. She didn't know what else to say. She felt like she had to say sorry for all the time that she was gone, for everything that he had been through, for not being able to save him, then and now.

"Why?" Dimitri asked but spoke again before she could explain. "It doesn't matter. There are more important matters at hand..."

"Rats."

"Yes. Filthy rats. Everywhere. And traces of those who were here long ago. And thieves, crawling from the woodwork, attracted by the promise of treasure." Dimitri gave a humorless laugh as he mused about the change of the world due to the monastery.

"Heh... Since the monastery fell, order in the area fell right along with it. You must have seen the state of the town near Garreg Mach on your way here. Vile Thieves run rampant. They pillage and loot to their hearts' content.

"I must kill them. Every last one. It's time to hunt down their nest."

"They're just trying to survive too. We don't have to kill them to stop them." Byleth pleaded despite knowing that he wouldn't listen to her words. As he was now Dimitri thought blood could only be answered by blood.

"They must die. Someone must put a stop to this cycle of the strong trampling the weak. Or do you condone their actions? Do you believe that the pillaging and slaughtering those rats live for is justified?! It is reprehensible, and they must be put down! I intend to give them a taste of the pain they have inflicted on others. Even if it means becoming a rat myself. I swore to at least do that much... I will not let them down..."

Byleth stared at him sadly, know everything he said he really believed. Hearing the words again she could still see the Dimitri knew, the idealist that wanted to make a world a better place for those that couldn't do it for themselves, but his tone of voice and his aggression hurt her deeply. She may have been able to handle it better if he wasn't so hostile towards her and the allies that she knew would be arriving soon. The whole conversation that had taken place in the chapel, Dimitri hadn't turned to her once.

Byleth sighed and followed the man that was no longer her husband out of the chapel and towards where the bandits made camp. Despite Dimitri refusing to look at her, she was determined not to leave him alone. Byleth knew he would rush right into the middle of the enemy encampment and he needed someone to watch his back at the very least.

* * *

"Why are you here?" Dimitri asked in a flat tone. The others had arrived, just as Byleth knew they would, and had helped them clear out the bandits but despite that Dimitri didn't welcome them warmly. Byleth didn't know if it was because her younger body hadn't adapted to having emotions or if she was just growing desensitized to his attitude, but Dimitri's maddened hostility didn't bother her as much as it had when she had first arrived. She felt numb to it all and it was probably reflected by her expressionless face.

"Did you forget? We all made a promise on this very day five years ago." Ashe replied with a frown. Mercedes followed his statement with a smile.

"Dimitri, weren't you the one who asked that we all meet up here?"

"Don't be silly! Of course you remember our promise. That's why you and the professor are here, right?"

"Your Highness... I have been following news of your whereabouts for a while now. I am relieved to have finally found you." Gilbert bowed, his tone a relieved one at finding his monarch safe and sound.

"Do not call me that. I am not a prince, but a walking corpse." Dimitri snapped and Byleth wanted to sigh again at his words, the numbness spreading through her chest slowly at his self-deprecation. Was there anything she could say to help him? She didn't know but she had to try. She would try and keep trying until he realized that this was not the way to atone for his survivor's guilt.

"You are very much alive because you are here, now, with us." Byleth told him with feeling, reaching out to touch his arm, trying not to feel hurt when he pulled away from her before she could touch him. Instead she let her hand fall to her side. Gilbert nodded in agreement with the professor's words.

"I can see with my own eyes that you are alive, Your Highness. But the jail cells in Fhirdiad are as solid as they come. How did you manage to..."

"Dedue." Dimitri answered, sorrow taking over the aggressive expression he had been wearing since they had met again. "He's dead. He died in my place."

"No." Byleth breathed before stopping the words that wanted to follow. She knew he wasn't dead. She knew that he would escape with the help of the Duscar soldiers they had saved before. She knew that he would reunite with them once again, but no one else would understand. Luckily the others took it as her being in shock at the supposed death of one of her students. The others looked at both her and Dimitri with pitied sorrow.

"I see. We will be sure to honor his loyalty, Your Highness." Gilbert said, giving his condolences before moving onto important political matters. "As for the state of the Kingdom, the lords from the western regions have declared their fealty to the Empire, starting with House Rowe. Cornelia's band of traitors now refers to the Kingdom territory as the Faerghus Dukedom. They've made Fhirdiad their stronghold as they continue to invade the eastern region."

"There are still some that are loyal to the kingdom." Byleth glanced to Felix and Sylvain. Both of their houses along with a few others would come to their aid if only Dimitri would call for it. Felix's father would even give up his life for Dimitri and the kingdom.

"Yeah, like mine and Felix's that remain stubbornly opposed." Sylvain agreed.

"Your Highness. Please allow us to take up arms at your side once more. What we need more than anything isn't soldiers, money, or supplies. We need the legitimate heir of Faerghus to overthrow the Empire and reclaim the Kingdom! Such is your duty. It is yours alone to bear and well worth fighting for. Only you can gather our troops and lead us back into the light."

"You're still needed, Dimitri." Byleth replied, waving a hand towards Gilbert and the speech he had just given, feeling a sense of Deja vu at her own words.

"I see." Dimitri began slowly. "So, you all agree that we must fight back. And you see how that woman... how the Empire cannot be forgiven. That we must wipe them all out until not a single one of them remains..."

"Wipe them all out? Umm, I don't think any of us here are suggesting anything that extreme..." Annette reasoned, looking to the others for their thoughts. They all silently agreed with her and Gilbert sighed at the extreme measures that Dimitri was willing to go towards his vengeance.

"Professor... There is something I would like to ask you. Please, join me inside the monastery." Byleth nodded and followed Gilbert inside, leaving the others to catch up with each other and what they had been doing the past five years. She knew she wasn't missing anything because she already knew what they had been up to, just as she knew what Gilbert was going to ask; about where she had been since the attack on the monastery. She would tell him exactly what she did last time she had lived through all this.

Gilbert explained what had happened to the kingdom; about how Cornelia had sentenced Dimitri to death for the death of his uncle, about how some people still had hope because the body had been concealed, about how rumors had popped up of platoons of imperial soldiers being killed brutally, and about how he had followed those rumors until he had found Dimitri. Byleth stayed silent as she listened politely. Gilbert thought that she had been asleep the past five years so of course he would want to make sure she was caught up on the turmoil that was plaguing the continent.

Byleth stayed silent through the whole conversation. She didn't need to prompt him to continue and she didn't have any questions to ask since she already had knowledge of all this.

"I fear his deep hatred, and the weight of his solitude, have consumed him for far too long... We must bring him back from the edge on which he stands. To that end, I must speak with His Highness. I imagine it will not be a quick or easy conversation. I pray that he is of mind to speak of such things. I am certain that my words will... Never mind. What must be done must be done."

"I will help in any way I can." Byleth promised, knowing full well that a single conversation wouldn't be enough to pull Dimitri back from that precipice. It would take months of continued support and a sacrifice...

She didn't want to think about that right now.

"Thank you. I would wager that you are weary after the day's events. Perhaps you should take this opportunity to get some rest."

Byleth nodded and left to head back to her room, taking her time to study the monastery as she followed the well-worn path to her dorm. There were so many memories here, both past and future, and seeing the monastery falling apart and full of holes had always been hard.

She paused when she noticed black, blue, and blonde down the path, watching Dimitri stalk along like the predator he was. He must have felt her eyes upon her because he stopped, turned, and their gazes met. She gave him a small smile which fell away when his stare hardened into a glare and he turned away from her. Her hands clasped together over where her heart sat unbeating as she followed him with her eyes until he was out of sight. The Ethereal moon was cold but without Dimitri's warmth at her side the wind felt even colder, cutting through to her bone, and her memories of their time together were mere embers to the reality she was currently living in.

She would save him. She just had to believe in that. _She would save him_.


	3. Chapter 3

You know, for some reason I thought this happened a little later than it does.

It kind of throws off the timeline I had in my head but whatever. I'll make do.

Please do not expect the chapters of this story to come out as fast as they have been. It'll probably slow down from here. Still, I hope you enjoy.

-DarkDevilsAdvocate.

* * *

Dimitri stayed in the chapel, away from the others, as he stared at the rubble that perfectly represented his life while the voices of the dead roared in his ears. He would always know when she would approach; he could feel it as one felt a chill walk up their spine. She never said anything and never seemed to flinch away from him even when he scowled at her and told her to leave him alone or to go away. The first time she had approached him she had grabbed his wrist without explaination and he had yanked away but his strong and stubborn professor simply grabbed at him again and shoved something into his hand before he could retaliate, glared up at him, then turned and walked away. All without a word. When his mind had become aware enough to turn away from the retreating professor to look at whatever she had shoved at him, he was surprised to see half a loaf of bread gripped in his gloved hand.

Every day she found a couple minutes to stop by and force some kind of food on him; bread, fruit, tarts and puffs, handful of nuts, sandwiches and wraps. Everyday a different food. Everyday without a word spoken. Even when he tried to push her away or turn and stalk out of the chapel, Byleth would just chase him down and force the food into his hands. He couldn't figure out what she had planned; why she would insist on coming to him and feeding him every day no matter how busy she got. He eventually just stopped trying, waiting for her to come to him, to take the food she offered, and watch her as she walked away without saying anything to him.

He noticed after two weeks of this that the voices didn't seem as loud when she was around...

* * *

"You've been busy, Professor." Sylvain called to pause Byleth long enough until he could make it to her side, one brow raised in an knowing expression as he looked at the root she held in her hand. Byleth had been making contact with the few merchants that had arrived after the Knights of Seiros had returned along with the other staff members. She had been talking extensively with Manuela while she formed a plan for the future battles they faced. She was racing against the clock until the end of the month and she felt like she was running out of time. "That's a powerful paralytic. Makes one wonder what it'll be used for."

"Sylvain..." She had been careful not to spill anything that could change the future she remembered but there was only so much she could do on her own. She needed people she could trust to put her plans into action and it couldn't just be any knight or priest. Any of them could be a spy and she couldn't risk that.

Dimitri must really be getting to her with his paranoia.

"Sylvain, I need you to do something for me." She told him seriously; glancing around to make sure that there was no one else that could overhear what she was about to tell him. "You must keep it an upmost secret."

"You're starting to scare me Professor. You sure you haven't caught whatever changed Dimitri?" Sylvain joked though his expression was serious. He seemed to catch on to her nervousness, as odd as it was to see that from their professor, and he leaned in a little while lowering his voice into a conspiratorial whisper. "What do you need?"

"Whatever I say, I need you to trust me and don't ask questions. There's a lot I can't tell you. Just... please." She sighed heavily, looked Sylvain in the eyes and explained what she needed of him.

* * *

It was bad today. Dimitri had tried to ignore them, to hold out, but their eyes drilled into him as he grew deaf over the roar of blood in his ears, unable to hear his own ragged breathing. Scorn and hatred burned along his skin as their voices screamed in his head until he couldn't turn a blind eye any more.

"You're wrong." He denied desperately as clawing accusations echoed around him. "It's not like that, Glenn. I swear it. Any love I once had for my stepsister... has been tossed aside. Only hatred remains. If I could tear that woman to shred right this very moment, I would. I don't care if she's the emperor. It's no different than killing anyone else. So I beg you... all of you... Do not worry about my resolve."

Their voices became quieter but they still stood there, almost as solid as a living person, with glaring eyes. Dimitri was acutely aware of their stares burrowing into him as they leered at him with disappointment.

"Please, Father... And you too, Stepmother... Do not gaze at me with that look in your eyes... I will bring you her head soon. And when I do, you may finally rest in peace. I know it... Yes, I know it..."

"Snap out of it, Dimitri." Byleth called, reaching out to touch him only to drop her hand when he spoke. She hid her flinch at the growl in his voice.

"What do you want?" She didn't know exactly what he was going through. She only had an idea from what he had told her, but it was enough to paint the picture. She didn't think she could deafen him to the voices of the dead but she would try everything to get him focused on the living.

"I wanted to check on you." Byleth told him truthfully, grasping her hands over her heart in a physical attempt to hold back the emotions and words that whirled around inside her, waiting to be freed. She had never been much of a secretive person, telling everything to first her father and then her husband. Holding everything back like this, carrying the weight of the future on her shoulders, sometimes it felt like too much, like she would break under it all. Sometimes she just wanted to confess everything but she couldn't. This was her burden.

"I see." Was all Dimitri said in reply to her concern. He turned the conversation towards the war, instead. "We should make haste and prepare to move out at once. I must kill her as soon as possible..."

"That won't stop them."

"What do you know?" Dimitri scowled, finally turning to face her, his voice deepening with his anger. "If I must, I will go by myself."

"Dimitri-."

"Pardon the interruption. We must prepare a counterattack at once." Gilbert came in, stopping whatever Byleth was about to say. "The Imperial army has caught wind of our position. It would seem they were patrolling this place, after all."

"The Imperial army, is it? Well, well. Hehehe..."

"Your Highness... I ask that you please refrain from reckless behavior in battle." Gilbert asked but Dimitri didn't seem to be paying him much mind, already lost into thoughts of revenge. Byleth thought she did well hiding the shiver that ran through her at Dimitri's sadistic laugh. What bothered her wasn't that she felt a slight fear at the sound... it was that it had attracted her. If she hadn't been so keenly aware of Dimitri's current disdain for her, and that they were currently in the chapel of the monastery, she might have done something regrettable.

"I'll go make sure the others are prepared." She told the two men before turning and fleeing from her own body's reactions to the man that both was and wasn't her husband.

Only in the quiet of her own mind did she admit that she missed his touch.

* * *

The battle was over and Byleth was tired from keeping enemies off of Dimitri's back while giving the orders that would keep the others alive but she knew she wasn't done yet. She waved to Sylvain and Felix and approached where Dimitri stood with the captured enemy commander who was begging for his life.

"A beast of your depravity, prattling on about family? How amusing."

"As though you could understand... such a thing as love... You heartless monster!" The general scowled at Dimitri's condescending tone.

"You are a monster too, general. You have just yet to realize it. A monster who thinks he's a man... despicable. As a general, you must have killed countless souls without a shred of mercy. Do you still remember the sound of them begging, just as you're begging now? Or, now that your life is at its end, will you hold to the lie that your hands are not stained red with blood?"

"This... this is war. I did what I had to for the Empire... for the people... for my family!"

"So, you are piling up corpses for the people and for your family. And I am doing the same for the salvation of the dead... After all is said and done, we are both murderers. Both stained. Both monsters." Byleth heard Sylvain curse under his breath at her side as they listened to Dimitri's rant. It was then that she realized that though they had an idea of Dimitri's madness, that they had never seen it like _this_. Even during the last timeline she lived through, they hadn't been close enough to hear him threatening this man like that.

"You're wrong!"

"Am I? I can smell the rotting flesh upon your hands even now, General."

"Enough! That's enough!"

"I won't kill you right away, my fellow monster. Unless you object to watching your friends die. One... by... one. If so, I will do you the service of removing your eyes first so that-." Byleth was finally close enough to slip the dagger she normally carried at her waist out of it's holster and in between the plates of the general's armor. As his body stiffened and he fell to his side, he managed to ground out an apology to someone named Fleche and Byleth knew she had made the right decision.

"What's the meaning of this?" Dimitri demanded as he glared at Byleth, ignoring how Sylvain and Felix grabbed the still body of the general and dragged it away. Byleth and Dimitri stared at each other while she seriously considered running away from him and the dark look he leveled on her. No, she would stand her ground. She would not have anyone think her a coward, especially this man. She took a deep breath and answered honestly.

"I miss the Dimitri I knew."

"The Dimitri you once knew is dead. All that remains is the repulsive, blood-stained monster you see before you." He told her as he looked down at her. "If you do not approve of what I have become, then kill me. If you insist that you cannot then-."

"NO!" Byleth shouted, interrupting his rant and gaining the glances of the others as she returned his scowl with one of her own. They had never heard her raise her voice to any of the students before and though they were curious, they knew better than to get involved. All of them quickly found other things to distract themselves with... far away from Dimitri and Byleth. "I miss MY Dimitri! I miss my _husband_! I miss the man that worked hard to make sure the people of his kingdom were taken care of! I miss the man that would greet everyone he passed, even if it was just a 'hello' and a nod! I miss the man that would take long rides with me so we could just talk! I miss the man that would simply hold me when I would have nightmares!"

Byleth had had enough of tears and yet they came anyway as she confessed her heart. She shouted in her head for her to shut up. Shut up. SHUT UP! but her mouth wouldn't listen and she spilled her guts of all the pain she had been carrying the past month. Dimitri only stared at her in shock, listening to her words.

"What are you saying?" He asked, his voice oddly quiet. Suddenly something seemed to click in his head and he moved a step closer, somehow managing to make it feel menacing. Byleth rubbed at her eyes as she continued. She had already ruined this, whatever future they had, she might as well keep going.

"I know you think you're a monster but you'll become a good man and a better king. I _know_ you will but I'm afraid. I will have to let him die for that to happen and I don't know if I have the strength for that. It's the best outcome, I _know._ A little bit of pain to save so many others from the _same_ pain but can I really let him just die without trying _anything_?"

"Who?" Dimitri grabbed Byleth's upper arms in a crushing grip, ignoring how she flinched at his touch, shaking her a bit when she remained quiet. "Who!?"

"No. You _will _become you who need to become. Even if it means you will never be mine." She told him before pushing his arms off of her, looking up at him once more then turning to walk away from him. She left him there in a dumbfounded state with more questions than answers.


	4. Chapter 4

She was avoiding him.

And that fact irritated him.

Dimitri stalked through the monastery looking for signs of his professor, calling out to and giving chase when he caught sight of her but she always managed to evade him, seeming to know the monastery better than he did and he had to wonder if it was in relation to whatever she had said after the last attack. Her smaller frame and less restrictive armor allowed her to slip in between holes and cracks that were being still being repaired, giving her the chance to escape him time and time again.

He understood the irony of his actions; now he had told her to 'leave him alone' and to 'go away' so many times when she had approached him that now that she _was_ leaving him alone, running away more precisely, he was chasing her down. Dimitri wanted answers and he had lost a lot of his patience over the 5 years since the war had begun. He hung outside the lectures throughout the week on the off-chance he could corner her but Byleth simply disappeared in the crowd of exiting students. It had gotten to the point that he had even checked where he knew she would be, her room at night, but even then she had managed to slip away from him.

This time, though, he would catch her. She had always been diligent; arriving early to lectures and meetings and even if she came with others, he would wait to catch her alone afterwards. This was a conversation he felt that they needed to have and it was one he felt was probably best held alone; between only them.

* * *

Byleth entered the meeting room with Annette and Mercedes, the two talking about tea parties and sweets while she listened in quietly. She had purposely made sure she was with someone else when she came to the meeting room because she figured that if she had been alone Dimitri would have taken the chance to ask her questions that she didn't want to answer. From the dark look he leveled on her, she had guessed correctly.

She felt torn; she was pleased he thought her credible enough that he didn't just write her words off as the ramblings of a crazy person but she was also upset that he was so doggedly determined to get answers to the little bit she had let slip.

Once everyone had arrived Gilbert began the war meeting.

"We managed to repel the Imperial army, but we remain divided on our next course of action. I anticipate a second and third wave of attack... With our current forces, we'll have our hands full just defending."

"It's a miracle we managed to repel the Imperial army with the few units and resources we do have." Sylvain piped in. Byleth slowly tuned out the rest of their words as she fell into a sleepy daze. The past week had been a bit harder than she had imagined it would be with her basically playing hide and seek with Dimitri. She was probably in better shape now than she had been in the rest of her life, never having run so much. Even battles only lasted a couple hours on the long side and even then had down time. Dimitri had proven why he made such a good ruler in her past, his future, with his unwillingness to admit defeat.

Already she was unable to use her room since she had woken to Dimitri standing over her in the middle of the night earlier that week. She had screamed, lashed out, and managed to run away while he was doubled over in more surprise than pain. A daylight inspection had proved that he had just pulled on the door with his monstrous strength until the wood had splintered around the lock. Even after being replaced twice more, the door was broken, showing that Dimitri had come back to see if she had returned. It had gotten to the point that the monetary staff no longer changed her door out, leaving it in it's severed state.

Because he had literally _broken in to her room._

Her sleep schedule had become one of naps throughout the day and night in a variety of hiding places. Byleth had learned of plenty of hiding places when she was still Archbishop and even more during this past week, allowing her to take short naps before some internal sense would wake her and she would switch places. It wouldn't do to let Dimitri find her in one of her hiding places and make that place forever unusable; much like her room.

She had scared poor Mercedes when she had found Byleth asleep under her bed at one point.

When she wasn't napping or catching her breath from running from Dimitri's determination, she thought about what her confession would mean for the future. She knew that he loved her in her future, but the Dimitri now? How could she know? She didn't know exactly when _her_ Dimitri had started loving her. As far as she knew, he had developed those feelings during the war and now she had ruined it all because she couldn't keep her own mouth shut. Still... perhaps this was better.

Over the past week Byleth had used the moments alone to contemplate her past and future; gently going over the memories of that night, as fragile as they were, and she came to the realization that most of Dimitri's deaths had been because he had stepped in the way of the attack meant for _her_. She could only hope that if this Dimitri would never be hers it meant that he would at least be safe.

She just needed to get him out of this need for vengeance.

"Professor... Whatever you decide, we shall follow." Byleth glanced up quickly at Seteth's voice calling her title and she looked at all the others that were staring at her. She hadn't been paying attention to the conversation but she had heard it already. She took a moment to steel herself before finally meeting Dimitri's gaze with her own.

"We should go take back to Fhirdiad."

"You were entrusted with leading the church. One would think the logical step is to march to Enbarr. If Lady Rhea is being held prisoner in the Empire, we don't have time to waste taking back Fhirdiad. Can you deny it?"

"And you have a responsibility to the people of Faerghus, living and dead, but you're leaving them to Cornelia's hands!"

"If we take Enbarr then the war ends then the war will end!" Dimitri snapped back and the others could only watch as the two that they were looking towards for leadership glared at each other. The contest of wills may have continued if Gilbert hadn't coughed and brought everyone's attention to himself.

"Either way, we are in need of numbers. It is essential that we secure backup."

"You have already sent a letter to Rodrigue?" Byleth asked, finally turning her eyes away from Dimitri to look at the knight who gave a nod in answer and she turned away from the group. "We'll wait until he sends a reply. He'll lend us the troops we need."

Byleth paused and glanced to Dimitri again, knowing that despite her objections they would move towards Enbarr anyway.

"Then we can march on the Empire." She saw the brief surprise on his face before she turned away from him and headed towards the door, pausing once more to look back at them. Without a second thought she focused on the future king, stuck her tongue out at him, turned and fled out the door.

"Professor!" Dimitri shouted, the first to recover from the shock at her immature gesture, and pushed forward to run after her. The others heard his heavy footsteps fading in the distance while silence hung heavy over their heads. Felix was the one to break it.

"What is going on with them?"

"I think it's cute." Mercedes replied with a smile, gaining incredulous stares from the others. "Have you noticed? As long as he's focused on her, he's not as focused on death and revenge."

"You're right. He has been... nicer." Ashe added as he thought back to an encounter he had had earlier that week.

_ Ashe was walking through the reception hall towards the stairs so he could visit the library as Dimitri rushed passed him only to pause and back track so he could ask if he had seen the professor._

_"Y-yeah, I think I saw her at the dining hall." He answered, keeping his gaze on the future king as he waved towards where he had just come from._

_"Thanks." Dimitri turned and ran towards where Ashe had pointed, leaving him standing there in surprise. A word of gratitude was not what he had expected from someone who had already told them all that he would sacrifice them all for his vengeance._

"Do you think this is all her plan?" Sylvain asked, looking to the others who gave varying answers along the line of 'I don't know'.

* * *

_What am I DOING?!_

Byleth gasped as she ran, thinking about what she had just done. When she had looked at Dimitri in that meeting room she had wanted to tweak his proverbial tail feathers but sticking her tongue out at him? Like a _child_? Whatever had possessed her?!

She could hear Dimitri behind her, following her through the reception hall and the entrance hall, dodging people and pillars. Out the front doors where Byleth gave the guard a wave of her hand as she turned and ran up the dormitory path. Dimitri stayed on her heels the whole way.

She took corners sharply and slipped through holes in the hopes of losing him but his constant search through the week had given him a good layout of the monastery and the tricks that worked earlier now only slowed him down a little. It would only be a few moments before he was behind her again. For what felt like an hour they ran in a game of cat and mouse.

Desperate she sprinted up the stairs, taking them two at a time, and dashed down the hall. Somewhere in her head she knew she was running into a dead-end. There were only two options left; find a place to hide or figure out a way to get around him so she could get back downstairs.

Hide. Where could she hide? It would have to be a place with a lot of stuff. Maybe the infirmary? No. Hanneman's office? No. No. Hiding wasn't an option. Dimitri would tear every room apart to find her. He hadn't been chasing her for a week just to give up now.

She would have to feint. The meeting room would be best for that. She could keep the table between them, leading him further into the room, and make a break for the door.

Byleth had just made it to the meeting room when something grabbed her coat, causing her to lose her footing and fall backwards. She had closed her eyes in anticipation of the impact that never came and when she looked up she saw Dimitri glaring down from above her as he held her in a dancer's dip. She clung to him on the off-chance that he decided to just let her go so that she wouldn't just slam into the ground.

"Finally, I caught you." Dimitri uttered after a few moments of them both catching their breath. "Now, Answer me. What were you talking about? What did you mean husband? _Who_ is going to die?"

"I can't tell you that. It could change things and I can't allow that to happen."

"You make it sound like you can see the future."

"I can't... I can't _see_ the future but I..."

"Good, you're both here." Gilbert interrupted, pausing in the doorway as he took in the sight of Dimitri holding Byleth as he bent her backwards until she was almost parallel with the floor while both turned their gazes away from the other and towards the knight. He hesitated a moment, unsure if he wanted to continue after seeing something like that, but importance of the matter pushed him forward, pulling out the letter that had just arrived.

"What is it?" Dimitri demanded as he straightened up, pulling his professor up with him and dragging her along as he moved to inspect the letter, keeping a grip on Byleth's upper arm so she couldn't escape. He eventually let her go to take the letter that was offered.

"We received word from Rodrigue." The knight replied, watching as Dimitri skimmed the letter while the professor sighed. Byleth didn't need to look it over, she knew what it said, and she nearly groaned at what it meant.

They would be heading to Ailell.


	5. Chapter 5

The last chapter had been hard to write. I had it all in my head and it would flow great but for some reason it just didn't want to transfer into written word.

This chapter was also difficult to write but for different reasons. I wasn't sure where to go next after the last chapter. I wanted to skip Ailell altogether (it's not my favorite place) but I was sure people might have questions on what happened after the letter arrived.

Ugh. I don't know. Something, I suppose. Next chapter should be easier I hope.

Still, I hope you enjoy.

-DarkDevilsAdvocate

* * *

The heat was oppressive.

It was hot and sweaty and they were all miserable. Even Byleth who had been all over Fodlan was almost panting as they marched through the blistering heat. The only one that didn't show any signs of discomfort was Dimitri and Byleth wondered how he was so collected considering that he wore heavy black armor and a thick cloak about his shoulders.

Everyone gave verbal complaints as they finally arrived at the location that they were supposed to meet Rodrigue. Byleth kept her eyes on the horizon where she knew the traitorous army would show up, tuning out the others until she heard Gilbert call to her.

"Professor, be honest. How are you holding up?"

"It's hotter than I remember." She answered without thinking, glancing to them. Byleth figured it was fine to be honest in this. As long as she didn't get too specific then they would all assume it would be when she was a mercenary.

"You've been here before?"

"Once before." She told them, trying not to flinch away from the weight of Dimitri's gaze on her. After Rodrigue's letter had arrived Dimitri hadn't been as persistent in his pursuit of her. He hadn't _completely_ stopped but now it was only if they both managed to be alone together that he would try and corner her, leaving her be as soon as she fled into a place with other people.

Strangely, Byleth missed the attention.

"So you must know the story about this place."

"How it was born of the goddess's rage; That everything in the surrounding area had been burnt to ash by a light from the heavens."

"Yes. That legend fueled belief in a place of torment between our world and the next... where one's sins are purified in the cleansing flames."

"Nonsense. Sins are not so easily washed away." Dimitri growled, gaining everyone's attention.

"Indeed... And there are no accounts of such a place in scripture. Yet those who cannot face their own sins have no choice but to cling to the idea." Gilbert replied and Dimitri fell silent at the implication. Byleth looked up at the ridge that surrounded them and saw the battalion that had been deployed to stop them meeting up with Rodrigue's reinforcements.

"Get ready!" She shouted as she pulled her weapon free with one hand while the other pointed up at the enemies that had appeared to bring the other's attention towards them. "House Rowe's soldiers!"

Their gazes followed her pointing to see the soldier that had gathered along the ridge and followed her lead by pulling their own weapons out.

"There must have been a spy." Gilbert despaired then turned his gaze to Dimitri to see what he would order. "Shall we meet them in battle or wait for Rodrigue to arrive?"

"There is only one option. How kind of them to save us the trouble of killing them later."

"They're led by the Gray Lion. We won't be able to talk our way out of this." Byleth agreed, looking to the others as she shouted out the order. "Prepare for the attack!"

* * *

The battle had been miserable with the heat but even with their lesser troops they had proved to be the superior fighters. Rodrigue and his troops had arrived mid-battle and the tide turned with ease. Dimitri glanced around to gain an idea on where all his 'allies' were located and noticed that his professor was mere feet away.

Dimitri had backed off after Byleth had refused to give him any answers but that hadn't stopped him from watching her; the more he saw the more he was convinced that she knew something. For someone who had been asleep for the past 5 years, and had been in basic isolation from society before that, she seemed to know a lot about the people in this war. He had also noticed how Byleth had been scanning the ridge before the Imperial aligned soldiers had arrived.

It was frustrating because it felt like pieces of a puzzle were slowly being put into place but he was still missing something essential to put it all together. He just couldn't see the bigger picture that surrounded her. Not yet.

"You can't _see_ the future..." He murmured, watching as her gaze snapped to him with a wide-eyed stare. That was another change. The subtleties of expression she didn't have before was pronounced and it allowed him to see the surprise that covered her face now. He had noticed that she had started to show some emotional expressions on her face before she had disappeared five years ago but now her face had become so much easier to read. More so than it should have been for someone that had been asleep.

If he wasn't so sure about her integrity, it would have been easy to believe that she had been awake and alive the passed five years and it it would not have been much of a stretch to believe her an imperial spy.

He wanted to question her further. He wanted to force her to tell him the things he wanted to know. He wanted to corner her and keep her from escaping him until her secrets became his. He wouldn't, though, because he knew that nothing would come from such things. She could be surprisingly stubborn when she wanted to be. Dimitri and Byleth turned their stares away from each other and towards Rodrigue as he approached them with a smile.

"It's been too long, Your Highness. But try and temper your joy, will you? This is a war, after all."

"To say such a thing at a time like this. You have not changed a bit." Dimitri sighed, glancing at Byleth when she gave a stifled laugh.

"Don't let looks deceive you. I've had a rough go of it ever since I crossed blades with those traitors in Fhirdiad. When I heard you'd been executed, I rushed there as fast as I could, blind with fury. When I got there, I was fed some garbage about not being able to see your body. The next thing I knew, I was gripping my blade and..." Rodrigue paused, took a moment to breathe, and gave a nod to Gilbert when he changed his focus to the knight.

"Gilbert, you have done well to locate His Highness. I am truly grateful." His gaze moved over to Byleth next as he gave her a gentle smile. "And you... I have you to thank, as well."

"I didn't do much. We were just fortunate."

"Still, I will repay you for this someday, I swear it."

"You don't need to." Byleth shrugged off his gratitude, turning her eyes to Felix and Rodrigue followed her gaze, speaking to his son next.

"And you, Felix... You have also done well to bring His Highness here."

Felix gave a scoff but fell silent and Rodrigue turned the conversation away from gratitude and towards the war, finally asking to fight by their side which Felix objected to. He was the only one, though, and Rodrigue followed them with his troops back to Garrag Mach.

* * *

Byleth laid in bed, watching her broken door swing in the evening wind. She had finally convinced the monastery staff that Dimitri wasn't chasing her anymore and that he wouldn't be breaking into her room either. They would be replacing it again tomorrow. It didn't help with the cool night right now.

Gilbert, Rodrigue, Dimitri, and Byleth had all decided that they would head east towards the Great Bridge of Myrddin. It wasn't a bad idea and it would lead to something good, if things followed the same path as the last time she had lived through this.

Byleth sat up with a sigh and then stood. She wasn't going to be getting any sleep at this rate so she might as well walk around the monastery and maybe she would meet Rodrigue again. She remembered meeting him last time but she couldn't really recall what they had talked about. Had it been all that important then if she couldn't remember? Or had it simply been overshadowed by all the other events that came before and after?

She found herself in the cathedral, looking at the rubble that had collapsed over the alter. The gentle footfalls that approached her made her aware of his presence before he spoke.

"Even though it's in ruins, in some strange way, this monastery never truly changes, does it?" He asked and she turned her attention to him, letting him continue in the silence that followed his rhetorical question.

"I studied at the Officers Academy when I was young. Those memories come rushing back whenever I return. What are you doing here at this hour, anyway?"

"I couldn't sleep."

"It's the same for me. Perhaps you'll allow me to join you..." He asked, giving a soft smile at her nod.

"Much appreciated."

A comfortable silence followed them as they walked through the monastery. Byleth never had a problem with silence. She had learned while she was a mercenary that silence was sometimes essential; to set up an ambush, to keep from walking into an ambush, while scouting, and sometimes just to think.

The best place she found back when she was still running from Dimitri had been the Sacred Tomb. She knew no one else would risk going down there. She found the silence there thick and comforting, like a warm blanket that surrounded her, and she had once thought she had heard Sothis laughing at her. That or it was her own mind breaking from the stress of going back in time and living through the war a second time.

_You know you cannot change the path of fate by rewinding the hands of time... But I will enjoy watching you try. You have done the impossible before..._

She was alone again when she had opened her eyes and looked around. It could have very well been her own mind giving her an auditory hallucination.

Rodrigue interrupted her introspection with talk about his eldest son, Glenn. Byleth had never met him but from what she had heard from Dimitri and Felix, he seemed to have been an honorable man and a good friend and brother.

"No matter how much you grieve, the dead will never return. No magic in the world can bring them back. That's why their memory clings to the living like a curse. The more they were loved, the tighter their hold, and the more suffering they cause..." Rodrigue spoke softly. He was trying to make a point that Byleth was already aware of. Why Dimitri seemed so determined to make himself into the weapon of vengeance that he thought the dead needed. "I fear I am not a strong enough man to scold His Highness for his foolishness."

"Someone must. I have been trying but..."

"You have been doing better than I... As adults, it is our responsibility to scold him and help him find his way again. I come off as so self-important, but really... I'm just a failure of a man."

Silence spread between them again as Rodrigue fell into thought. Byleth waited for him to make his decision and focus on her again.

"Professor... I entrust the young prince, and the future of Faerghus, to you."

"You sound like you're going off to die." She told him with a sad smile, causing him to laugh.

"I suppose that was a dramatic way of putting it. My apologies. You know, I have no intention of insisting that you take back Fherdiad. All I ask is that you continue to rein in Dimitri's manic desire for revenge."

Byleth opened her mouth to speak but shut it with a clack of teeth when Rodrigue continued speaking about the plan to head towards the bridge, finishing it with a question of if she was afraid.

Byleth hesitated. She was afraid but not for the reasons he may think. She feared the future, of the death that she may have to let happen, of what it could mean for the relationship that was already strained between her and Dimitri. She had her own decision to make here. Dimitri would become a good and honorable king that would bring happiness to all his subjects but a sacrifice had to be made.

Could that sacrifice be her own?

"Are you?"

"A little, yes. Such is the nature of war." He admitted with a nod.

"Perhaps that can be mitigated... a little, at least." Byleth spoke with intent. She had made her decision and she was determined to surprise Sothis. She would change fate.


	6. Chapter 6

This chapter is my shortest yet.

It just did not want to come out. Next chapter should be faster. I have alot more planned for the clash of the three armies. Not to mention my stupid brain actually wanted to help and gave me an idea/inspiration for it. Look forward to it!

As always, please enjoy.

-DarkDevilsAdvocate

* * *

They were still on the outskirts of the bridge, waiting for Intel before they attacked. Gilbert found Byleth and brought her along as he approached Dimitri.

"The scouts have returned. As expected, there are quite a few Imperial soldiers stationed there." He said without preamble and Dimitri gave a sharp exhale of breath that wasn't quite like a laugh.

"I see. So, the enemy has prepared for our arrival... It matters not. I will kill them all, whether they are one or one hundred." Byleth frowned at Dimitri's words. She had thought he had been getting better, away from his viciousness, but then he would say something like this and she would be reminded of his terrible blood-lust and how little she had been able to help thus far.

"Don't say that."

"What would you do, if you saw the people who stole everything from you? If you saw them right before you eyes, living carefree lives and feeling no guilt. Would you feel nothing? Do nothing?" Dimitri ranted, his voice gaining a growl in his anger, and Byleth flinched. She knew what he would bring up next and she didn't really want to hear it.

"Five years ago... Did you not deem the woman who killed Jeralt to be unforgivable? I am most certain that you did. You couldn't let her get away with her crime, so you took up your sword in pursuit."

"I didn't drag innocent people into it!"

"Innocent?" Dimitr scoffed, tilting his head back as he looked down at her with a mocking smile. "There are no _innocents _here. Even you have blood on your hands. We are very much the same, you and I."

"You're wasting your time." Felix spoke as he came up to them. He had heard what had been said and he didn't agree. "There's nothing to be gained from exchanging words with a boar that has lost it's mind."

"Felix..." Gilbert spoke in a warning tone but Felix predictably ignored him.

"This is _war_. Every last one of us has lost someone we care for. But we all choose to suppress our anger and grief and go right on living. Do you know why?"

Gilbert and Dimitri remained silent and Felix's gaze focused on Byleth. He wanted an answer and she knew that she would have to give it since neither of the other two seemed inclined to.

"Because it doesn't help anyone. The focus should be on the living."

"That's right. All the boar is accomplishing is stacking up more corpses."

"Tell me, Felix... If the dead are beyond reach, is it not also pointless to mourn or even bury those who are lost?" Dimitri asked, causing Felix to scoff.

"Ha. That mind of yours. I'm done here."

"Dimitri." Byleth interrupted before Felix could bring up that it wasn't for Dimitri that everyone was here. That it was mostly apposing the Empire or siding with the church that gave them their troops. There was something fundamentally wrong with what Dimitri had asked that she felt she needed to correct before Felix could side-track her. "Those rights are as much for the living as they are for the dead."

The others fell silent as they all turned their gaze on her to listen to what she had to say.

"It gives us a chance to come to terms with our grief and the fact that the people we love will no longer walk beside us, that they are gone, that we will no longer be able to see or talk to them ever again. If you don't allow yourself to grieve all that pain, all that sorrow, it just builds inside you until there's no room for anything else."

Byleth blinked and looked up at the men who were all staring at her. She hadn't meant to become sentimental nor preachy in her speech but she was sure that was probably how it came across. She knew these feelings well. After her return to the past, the few days after meeting up with the others and driving out the bandits, she had allowed herself to cry, to scream into her pillow. She still carried the painful weight of her husband's repeated death on her heart.

"My apologies. I didn't mean to get sanctimonious." Byleth shook her head and focused her gaze on Dimitri who was the only one that would know that it wasn't Jeralt's death she had been speaking about. She took a step further and gave him a soft smile. "What I had really wanted to say was that you should be prepared."

"Is this when-?" Dimitri's eyes widened and he held an expression of mild panic as he looked towards the others, wondering which one it was that was supposed to die. Byleth watched his alarm and her smile widened. It was good to know that despite his lust for vengeance he didn't want the death of any of his comrades.

"No." She said with a soft laugh, bringing his gaze back to her and ignoring the confused ones of Gilbert and Felix. "Quite the opposite, in fact."

Rodrigue's steps hesitated at the sight of a Byleth smiling at three confused men. He gained their attention when he cleared his throat.

"Our troops are ready whenever you are, Your Highness."

"Shall we then?" The professor asked as she moved to walk by Rodrigue, pausing to give his shoulder a pat and frowned at him. "Rodrigue!"

"Next time, I swear." He told her with a soft laugh, confusing the other three men even more. When questioning eyes met his, he gave a wave of his hand, signaling that he wouldn't explain right then. After all, they had a battle to participate in.

* * *

Byleth followed Dimitri towards an armored knight, his spear coming up to stab forward with a frenzied smile without regard for the other knight that came towards his side, axe at the ready.

"Your Highness!" A shout drew Dimitri's attention as the axe that was swinging for his head was intercepted by another. White hair contrasted against the dark skin of the newcomer that stood between the future king on his impending death.

"D-dedue? You're alive? How?"

"Pay attention!" Byleth shouted as she leapt forward and engaged the enemy Dimitri had forgotten in his shock at finding out that his friend and retainer was still alive. Her sword slipped through the enemies' heavy armor and took his life. "You can ask him about it after the battle is over!"

"She's correct, Your Highness."

"R-right." Dimitri turned back to the focus on the fight to take the bridge. It felt like hours, battles always did, but only took minutes. When most of the Imperial troops were either dead or were retreating Byleth approached Dimitri who was staring hard at the still bodies that surrounded him.

"Idiots. Embracing death for the sake of that woman. Truly foolish..."

"What troubles you?" Byleth asked, watching the expression on his face carefully. He felt concern but he didn't know why. He didn't want to regret killing those who followed Edelgard; they were fools and beasts to him. They had to be or else he would start to feel guilty for their deaths.

"I... I don't know."

"Cheer yourself. Some good has come from today." Byleth smiled, following Dimitri's gaze to where Dedue stood, speaking with Annette and Ashe.

"Right." He gave a nod and moved towards his friend and retainer so that he could question him about how he had managed to survive. Byleth let her eyes wander, trying to see when that woman would show. She was distracted from her search by Rodrigue coming up to her and clearing his throat.

"We should head back to Garrag Mach to discuss our next course of action." She nodded and moved with him to retrieve Dimitri and the others. They were headed back, leaving behind a couple battalions to keep the bridge under their control in case the Empire tried to attack and keep it back.

"Please! I need to join you, no matter the cost!"

"I'm sorry, but my hands are tied..."

Byleth's steps faltered and she fell behind as Rodrigue stepped forward with a scowl for the poor knight that had been trying desperately to turn the girl away.

"By the goddess! What's with all the commotion?" He asked, stepping into the conversation with ease. None of the others seemed to have noticed the girl's shocked expression when her eyes fell on Dimitri standing at Byleth's side. The only reason the professor had was because she had been focused on this girl, recognizing her for the role she would play. "What is this girl doing here? This is an army, not an orphanage."

"I believe she's from a nearby village. She keeps insisting that she needs to join our ranks." The knight answered.

"And you thought we could use a child on the front lines? Hurry up and take her back to her parents."

"My family is gone. I don't have anywhere else to go. Please! I can use magic and I can fight! I can cook, do laundry, anything!" The girl interrupted, a desperate tone raising her voice.

"I'm sure there are plenty of more suitable places to find work. Why are you so fixated on this army, young lady?"

"I need... to get revenge. I must strike down the one who murdered my big brother!" Byleth flinched at the girl's words. This girl's brother had been the general that had marched troops against them at the monastery; the family resemblance was striking. Though she blamed Dimitri, and may have been right to had the professor not stepped in, it had been Byleth that had gotten the final blow.

"Your Highness... What should we do?"

"Let her do as she pleases." Dimitri dismissed, turning his gaze away from her. Byleth wondered if he saw the similarity between her and the General he had threatened to torture? Did he have in inkling on who she wanted revenge on? Or did he just want to indulge her because he was on his own quest for vengeance? That he understood her desire?

"Thank you... very much."

Byleth swallowed thickly at the underlying menace the girl's words held. That fateful event was coming up all too soon and she was not looking forward to it.


	7. Chapter 7

So I've been very careful about writing battles mostly because I can't write them very well but also because I wanted to prevent writing about having to fight students from other houses that some people may have recruited.

This chapter will change that.

I didn't realize what would happen if I didn't recruit the other students my first play through and I just wanted to SAVE someone.

Also, I figured with magic being flung about, that healing magic must be pretty effective if no one ends up with permanent disfigurements.

As always, Enjoy.

-DarkDevilsAdvocate

* * *

"We don't _need_ that many people set up to heal." Gilbert sighed. They stood over a map that Byleth had made of Gronder field that was marked to show where she remembered the Imperial troops and the alliance soldiers would be set up. She had made suggestions as to potential tactics. Gilbert and Rodrigue had agreed with everything except one part. They had been trying to convince Byleth for the past few that they did not need so many people in support roles. Seteth and Dimitri stood aside and silently watched the argument unfold.

Dimitri found it all fairly amusing that this petite woman was standing up to two men who were used to having a lot more authority and respect than she was currently giving them.

"It's important that we have that much support." Byleth replied back sharply. She had given the suggestion that they set up Manuela, Mercedes, Flayn and anyone else that were strong in the healing arts to be medics for the battle and her plan even had others, like Annette, to be back-up healers.

"You're crippling our attacking force with this set up!" Rodrigue put in with a slam of his hand on the table and the map that lay on it. The constant circles they had been arguing in had frayed his patience to the point that courtesy was no longer of importance. "We're going to be going against the Imperial army and, from what you said, the alliance may show up as well!"

"Claude won't attack right away. He'll hold back and see how everything goes."

"That doesn't change the fact that we will potentially be facing not one but _two_ armies. This won't be a child's mock battle. There will be _consequences_."

"I _know_ that! That's why this is important!"

"Seteth! Your Highness! Could either of you talk some sense into her?" Rodrigue pleaded but Seteth hesitated. He wasn't sure how he felt about Flayn not only being on the battlefield but doing so in such a vulnerable position. On the other hand, _because_ she would be a healer that meant she would not be on the front lines and would be protected by other units. Seteth could definitely see where Gilbert and Rodrigue were coming from and both were experienced and well-respected but he also felt that there was more to Byleth's plan than she was letting on. Her days as a mercenary helped to lend her words credence. All those points made it hard to support either side.

Dimitri spoke up before Seteth could come to a decision.

"We'll follow the Professor's plan."

"Your Highness-." Rodrigue began only to be cut off by Dimitri reiterating his words with look that bordered on a glare, much to the surprise of the others in the room. They all knew that he had much respect for his father figure he had known his whole life so the fact that he sided so forcefully against him for a professor he had known a little more than a year was telling.

"We will follow the Professor's plan."

"As you command, Your Highness." Rodrigue gave in with a bow, Gilbert following suit. Byleth gave Dimitri a grateful smile for his assistance. She had been surprised by his support since he still hadn't gone through his reformation yet; he hadn't fully changed into the man she knew he could be. It had been a welcomed surprise, though, and it gave her hope.

Dimitri for his part had been watching Byleth and had long since come to the conclusion that she seemed to know more than she should; she had known that Dedue would arrive at the bridge, after all, and he had to trust that she knew what would happen so he would indulge her whims until she proved herself unreliable.

* * *

Three armies stood on the field of Gronder, facing each other. The Imperial army had already set up on the meadow with a large wooden structure with a ballista mounted at the top manned by a very frightened Bernadetta.

Byleth stared up at her with a determined expression, refusing to let the others see how scared she was. When Dimitri gave the order to 'kill every last one of them' they rushed forward. Ingrid and Ashe had their orders from Byleth to stay by Dimitri's side. His thirst for vengeance would force him to rush at Edelgard and he would need cooler heads to protect his flank. Normally that was Byleth's job, reigning in the future king's recklessness, but she had another goal this time.

Wood creaked under her boots as she rushed up the structure towards Bernadetta who blinked at the resolute professor coming towards her. She quickly focused the balista towards Byleth, pausing her in her steps.

"P-professor?" She called as if to make sure what she was seeing was real. Byleth had come to a halt several feet from the shy girl, casting a quick glance around to check to state of the battle so far. As predicted Dimitri and the others were fighting with the Imperial army while the Alliance sat back; waiting to see how the tides would turn.

"Bernadetta, Come with me." Byleth petitioned holding her hand out towards the girl, frowning when she shrunk further away at the move. "We have to get off this structure."

"N-no, I can't. I have... I have to stay here. This is where I can help Edelgard the most."

"Up here in the middle of this wide field where everyone could see you?" Byleth asked. She didn't want to prey on the shy girl's fears but she was desperate and quickly running out of time. The Kingdom army was making head-way faster than she thought possible with about half their troops as support classes. "Why not come with me to the forest where there's a nice canopy of leaves and walls of trunks."

"I-I can't... I can't. I was ordered..." Bernadetta looked like she was about to cry and it broke Byleth's heart but this was _important_. She had to get Bernadetta off this potential bonfire before Dimitri and the others got passed Hubert and close to Edelgard. She didn't think she could live through the horror again.

She had had nightmares for years of Bernadetta's screams while her skin burned and popped; her eyes ran like tears as they melted as her flesh darkened until it just flaked away.

Never again. Never again would Byleth let that happen.

"Come with me, Bernadetta." Byleth pleaded desperately. "If you don't want to, that's fine. Just turn around and return to the Empire. It doesn't matter, we'll do whatever you want, but we _have_ to get off this structure."

"I was ordered to stay here... I have to stay here." Bernadetta replied with a shake of her head but her expression told Byleth that she wanted to give in, that she wanted to take her hand and leave the whole thing behind, but something was stopping her. Was she that afraid of what would happen to her should she become a deserter?

There was a small sound underneath their feet that was quickly growing into a roar. Byleth gasped and leapt forward to wrap her arms around the frightened girl as the wood groaned and crackled. Fire licked upwards around them, the air heating up rapidly, the edifice starting to bend and break as the lumber burned and blackened.

Byleth kept her arms around Bernadetta who clung to her like the terrified child she was and pulled her along as she raced the growing fire. One of the weakened beams broke under her foot and sent them rolling down the sloping ramp. The blaze surrounded them and only grew in strength with the food from the construct as it began to collapse and Byleth stood, even as the fire blistered her skin, and dragged herself and her student away from the raging flames.

"Professor!" Several people called as she fell upon the grass that felt like needles against her scorched skin, shooting pain from each individual point. Byleth looked towards the person she clung to that was much too still.

"Bernadetta?" She called despite how raw and painful her throat felt. She moved her arm a little to jostle the girl, ignoring the pain it caused herself. Sorrow threatened to drown her as she watched the purple-haired girl's body lay completely still in her arms. She wanted to cry but tears hurt. Breathing hurt. Laying there hurt. Everything hurt; especially her heart. Had she failed again? Had she been unable to save her? Did that mean she was unable to save anyone? Would Rodrigue and Dimitri die all the same?

Tears ran down her cheeks despite the sting they left in their wake as they traced trails across her face. Byleth didn't pay much mind to the people that surrounded her.

"Bernadetta..." She croaked, gasping when she felt movement in her embrace.

She was alive. Bernadetta was still alive. She had done it. _She had saved someone_.

Byleth smiled as she the darkness of unconsciousness welcomed her.

* * *

Pain greeted her first as she slowly awoke. Sound came next but it took a lot longer for her brain to interpret the words that were being said.

"She still needs a lot of rest. The burns had been severe but because she had received help so quickly she should make a full recovery." Manuela's voice seemed too loud in the quiet stillness as she explained her patient's condition. Byleth wondered how long she had been out. "But she shouldn't strain herself too quickly. She had blisters all over her body and parts of her clothes had melted to her body. Bernadetta got off lightly with only minor burns. Professor Byleth had protected her with her own body."

"I see." Byleth was surprised to hear Dimitri's voice and even more so when she heard the subtle rustle of cloth as he approached her bedside. She evened her breathing and feigned sleep. She didn't know why she felt such a need but it proved fruitful when she felt the cool touch of Dimitri's fingers brush against her too hot skin of her forehead. It took her a moment to realize that he wasn't wearing his normal gloves.

"Foolish." He spoke softly after a long silence. Since no one answered him or asked him about what he had said, Byleth figured they were alone. "Truly foolish, letting yourself get hurt for another's life... But I suppose your generosity is one of your good points."

She felt his presence hovering over her, as if he was leaning over and she struggled to keep her breathing even. For a moment she thought he might kiss her but then he pulled away and the sound of his steps faded as he retreated. She thought she heard him murmur 'get better quickly' as he walked away but she might have been mistaken.

Without the distraction of Dimitri's company, the pain of her burns came rushing to the forefront. She was keenly aware of the feel of scratchy fabric of the blanket over her or the hardness of the bed she lay on. It hurt. It all hurt. It also felt like heat was spilling from her skin in waves that pulsed with her pain.

Byleth sighed and dealt with the ache. It was a small price to pay for the life of another.

Manuela had said that Byleth had been lucky that the healers had gotten to her fast enough but Dimitri had been there. He had seen how it had drained each one of them to exhaustion as they spent their magic to keep the professor alive and to heal her and Bernadetta's wounds. The only reason she would make a full recovery was because of her foresight to insist on having that many healers, standing up to Rodrigue and Gilbert who both had more experience in life. Byleth had something more, though; She seemed to know the future. The more Dimitri saw the more he was convinced of that.

He didn't know what to feel about his Professor knowing the future. There was still to much he didn't know. She said that she couldn't see the future so how was it that everything she said came true?

His feelings were mixed. He wanted to hate her for keeping so many secrets; for manipulating everyone and everything to go the way she desired.

He had wanted to hate her but when he had heard everyone scream, when he had seen her burning, when he had seen her laying still on that field he knew that it was not hate he felt.


	8. Chapter 8

Well, this is it.

The chapter that most people were waiting for.

I wonder if this will satisfy or disappoint?

Either way, Please enjoy.

-DarkDevilsAdvocate

* * *

"Deaths!" Byleth shouted suddenly, startling Manuela into almost dropping the bottle she was carrying. The physician turned to stare at the woman who had shouted out with a disapproving frown for scaring her half to death and for putting strain on a throat that was still raw from smoke damage.

"What?"

"Were there any deaths?!" Byleth asked with urgency, ignoring how her voice was harsh and her throat painful when she spoke. She had been on a basic diet of soups and laudanum for the pain and was only recently weaned off of it. No longer in a drugged stupor she had woken in surprise to see the familiar surroundings of her room and then panic had settled in. That was when she had screamed out. She now stared at Manuela with her heart in her throat.

"No, You protected Bernadetta, taking most of the damage yourself. She's resting in her room currently." Manuela explained with a sigh as she readjusted her grip on the jar. She had just finished applying it to the professor's wounds, the smell of aloe heavy in the room.

Byleth stared up at the songstress blankly, letting the meaning of her words to sink slowly in.

"No one died?"

"No, everyone's safe." Manuela assured with a smile. "Now you rest here. It'll take at least another week for your wounds to finish healing."

Her attention brought to her wounds Byleth realized that the burned skin that had been blistered and pocked was now a pinkish-red and stung like a harsh sunburn when the cloth of her blanket and chemise, that was working as a hospital gown since her own clothes had been burned or cut off, brushed against the newly skin.

What had changed? Why hadn't that village girl attacked Dimitri? If Byleth was remembering correctly Fleche had stabbed him after Gronder field when they had been on their way back to the monastery but if Manuela had thought that she had been talking about Bernadetta then that meant that Dimitri hadn't been attacked nor had Rodrigue died.

That meant there was still time.

Byleth gripped the blanket as she waited while Manuela dally around the room as she gave instructions; Stay in bed, drink alot of fluids, apply the aloe frequently so the skin stays moist. She was going to wait until the other woman had left and then she would escape her room at the first chance she got. Byleth figured that if and when Manuela found out that she wasn't resting like she was supposed to that the songstress would probably chase her down. She was also sure that the physician wasn't nearly as determined as Dimitri had been when he had given chase some months earlier and so she would be much easier to evade.

The minutes ticked by and Byleth's leg twitched as her impatience grew. She didn't know what had changed to put off the attack on Dimitri but every second stuck in her room was a second that wasn't spent searching for the potential murderer. The door finally clicked close as Manuela stepped out and Byleth waited a few precious minutes to ensure that the physician was well and truly gone before throwing the covers off and slipping out of bed. She stumbled briefly from the stiffness in her body that came with her wounds and laying in bed for who knew how long; a week? Two? More?

She looked for something to wear other than her chemise, finding an old academy uniform to wear instead even though there was no one else that had the uniform on. Not since the Imperial army started the war five years earlier. Her body stung as the cloth settled over the burned skin but she ignored it for the urgency of the task ahead of her.

No one she asked seemed to know where Dimitri had disappeared to and Byleth ran on, through the halls. Her whole body ached from her fresh reddish skin to the muscles that hadn't been stretched properly to her lungs that labored under damage from the smoke she had inhaled. She ignored her pain as she ran, pausing with a gasp when she came across Rodrigue walking in the entrance hall.

"Have you seen Dimitri?" She asked between pants, trying desperately to catch her breath. Normally after such a major injury one would take their time getting back on their feet, adjusting to the movements needed for daily life and then training for battle, but she didn't have time for that. She didn't know how much time she had before the girl decided to do what she didn't on their way back to Garrag Mach but she had to make sure that nothing bad was going to happen.

Last time Dimitri had been stabbed he had just sat there while Fleche had ranted at him without resisting or fighting back, as if he had given up and was waiting for his death. It was only Rodrigue's intervention that had save Dimitri in more ways than one.

"I saw him in the court yard earlier. That girl that joined us a couple months ago, Fleche was her name I believe, asked to speak with him." Rodrigue answered with a small laugh, figuring that the girl was probably going to confess some feelings of affection for the dreary king. His impression changed as soon as he saw the alarmed expression on the professor's face.

"Where?"

"What is it?"

"Where are they?!" Byleth asked again, ignoring how Rodrigue's stance and face were growing concerned and leaping over his question entirely. "Where did they go?!"

"Towards the gazebo but what-." Rodrigue fell silent as Byleth dashed off, leaving him there with his questions, running out towards the Gazebo just as she saw the knife that the girl carried dig into Dimitri's stomach. The shock of it froze Byleth in her spot and stopped her breath in her throat. Memories of that dreadful night replayed in front of her eyes as Dimitri sat on his knees before the laughing woman. It didn't appear that he was going to defend himself this time either.

No. No. She couldn't let this happen. She had to do something! Byleth ran forward with a shout.

"Dimitri!"

"Your Highness!" With longer legs and unburdened by wounds, Rodrigue raced past Byleth and between Dimitri and the knife that was about to take his life. The blade dug through Rodrigue's clothes down to the hilt.

"NO!" Byleth and Dimitri screamed at the same time. Something heavy and hard weighed in her hand and Byleth realized she was holding the Sword of the Creator. When had it gotten there? Had she grabbed it on her way out of her room? She couldn't remember picking it up.

Where was her dagger when she needed it?

Byleth moved forward and slammed the hilt of her sword against the girl's temple and prayed that the girl would be alright as she crumpled to the ground with a groan. She stared at Dimitri holding Rodrigue, begging him not to die, while holding back her own tears.

She failed. She had tried to prevent this and she had failed. She had talked Rodrigue in wearing mail under his clothes that night she had met him in the cathedral, checking that he had it on before each battle by patting him either on the shoulder or on the back, scolding at him whenever she found him without it. She never insist that he wear the armor at the monastery because, other than the initial Imperial attack, there had never been any danger at Garrag Mach. Something had changed, though, and she didn't know what.

"_YOU!_" Byleth was dragged out of her internal rumination by Dimitri's angry voice as he glared up at his professor. He stepped over Rodrigue's motionless body and grabbed her upper arms to keep her from running away as he raged. "You knew this would happen!"

"No, no, it wasn't supposed to be like this!"

"You could have stopped this! Why? Why were you so determined to see death?"

"Why are _YOU?!_" Byleth screamed as everything crashed over her. She was in pain, Dimitri was mad at her and possibly hated her, and she had failed to prevent Rodrigue's death. Her frustration overcame her and she managed to shrug off his grip so she could push at him unsuccessfully. He was solid and unmoving and she felt it was a perfect representation of their whole relationship since she had accidentally thrown herself back in time. Her pushing at Dimitri's current standards and him immobile in his choices. "This is as much you as it is me! You just stood there and let her stab you! This is why your obsession with revenge is no good because you stop caring about yourself even when there are still so many people that care about you!"

Byleth glared up at Dimitri who somehow managed to keep his face fairly even in expression though he stared down at her, letting her yell at him while he remained silent.

"I _knew_ it was coming and I tried to prevent it but I failed! Are you _happy_ now?! I _tried_ and I _failed_! I'm a failure! I couldn't save Him then, I couldn't save him now, I couldn't save my father, and I couldn't save you! I can't save anyone! I'm a failure!"

_Don't cry!_ Byleth told herself desperately as her eyes stung and her vision blurred. _Don't cry, Don't cry, Don't CRY!_

"Fated... She said that some deaths were fated... I couldn't believe that because if that was true, if I couldn't save him, then that means that no matter what I did I wouldn't be able to save you... and I can't... I can't just..." Sobs broke her speech and everything in her begged her to run away, to hide the tears that were now flowing in burning streaks across her face. She didn't want to garner sympathy by crying or being pathetic. She had just wanted to explain. She figured he already knew, or had a strong idea, about her powers so she no longer felt like hiding them. She just wanted to let him know that she had tried to prevent Rodrigue's death. She hadn't wanted to ruin Dimitri and Felix's happiness for her own. Dimitri sighed and his hand lifted as if he was reaching for her even as she finished in a harsh undertone. "Knowing the future doesn't always mean you can change it."

"So that's what this is all about." A voice interrupted, startling Dimitri and Byleth into whirling around and staring at a man they both had supposed dead pulling himself into a seated position. "Both of you have been acting strangely lately. I admit I have been curious as to why."

"Y-you're alive?" Dimitri asked in an awed and disbelieving tone. Rodrigue looked up at the two of them as they stared down at him in shock.

"Your professor can be quite insistent." The older man told them with a half-laugh as he moved to the torn cloth so they could see the sparkle of a chainmail shirt. "I just made it a habit to put it on in the morning so I would stop forgetting."

"...nk...ess..." Byleth breathed as she sunk to the ground in relief. "Thank the Goddess. You're alive... Thank the Goddess..."

"I do believe we have alot to talk about, us three." Rodrigue told them as he got to his feet, moving towards the two. It was kind of amazing, really, that they hadn't been interrupted by anyone walking and confused by the yelling between the professor and the future king.

"Dimitri's hurt. He needs to go to the Infirmary." Byleth pointed out as she wiped at her face, getting to her feet stiffly. She had pushed herself physically and emotionally and she was suddenly so tired and sore.

"I'll be fine."

"You were stabbed. You can't just let it be."

"You _both_ need to go see Manuela. You, professor, haven't healed fully yet and have pushed yourself too far. I may have a bruise but I'm otherwise fine." Rodrigue scolded as he moved closer to the two. "We can speak after you both have been looked after."

"Do mind getting Sylvain, then?" Byleth asked much to the surprise of the two men. "We can't just leave her here."

"I had almost forgotten that she was here, honestly." Rodrigue admitted as three pairs of eyes fell to the unconscious woman lying in the grass. "And I was stabbed by her."

"You were _almost_ stabbed. Dimitri _was _stabbed." Byleth pointed out; causing Rodrigue to laugh and Dimitri to give a heavy sigh.

"I will make sure the professor makes it to the infirmary while you retrieve Sylvain. You can meet us in the infirmary and we can speak then." Dimitri ordered before leaning down towards Byleth. She held her hand out, thinking that he was going to pull her to her feet, but instead his arms moved around her back and under her knees as he pulled her up into a princess carry, much to Byleth's embarrassment.

"I-I can walk."

"Doubtful." Was all Dimitri gave to Byleth's weak protest as he strode calmly away with a grown woman in his arms as if he hadn't had a blade in his side minutes earlier. Rodrigue had been quickly forgotten as the professor tried to wiggle free of Dimitri's strong grip with little success.

* * *

"There you are!" Manuela nearly shouted but was then paused by the sight of the red-faced Byleth in the prince's arms, smiling slyly and deciding that she would go easy in her scolding.

Until she learned that Dimitri was also injured.

The two remained silent while the physician yelled at them and patched them up, patting Byleth's pinkly burned skin since she was supposed to be the mature adult.

After a serious reprimand, Rodrigue arrived and took charge of the two, giving Manuela leave to go get a drink. He waited until they were alone to turn to the two young adults.

"Now, let's talk."


	9. Chapter 9

Alright, Time for the big talk.

Originally I didn't mean for Rodrigue to find out about any of this and he wasn't supposed to be a part of this talk but because I had forgotten about when Fleche attacks Dimitri I messed up my own timeline and had to improvise.

So... Now Rodrigue gets to be in on the secret too. Yay?

Also, there's some spoilers that you only find out in the other routes so... If you've only done the Blue Lion route; buyer beware?

Despite my mistake, please enjoy.

-DarkDevilsAdvocate

* * *

"Now, Let's talk." Rodrigue closed the door to the infirmary and moved a chair against it that he sat in to block the entrance way and keep anyone from simply walking in. He crossing his arms as he looked at the two who were sitting next to each other on the other side of the room; his gaze focusing on Byleth since she was the mystery.

"I... I'm not sure where to start." She began as she wrung her hands together.

"How about when you mentioned knowing the future?" The older man prompted with a half-shrug. Dimitri remained silent at Byleth's side but his gaze wasn't on the slim woman sitting beside him but on Rodrigue. Somehow it felt to her that whatever happened he would defend her and that gave her courage, even if it was a self-delusion.

"I don't really _know _the future. I can't _see_ it either. It's just that there are some events that that I roughly know how they will unfold but, just like today, things could change from what I remember."

"From what you remember?"

"She's lived through all this before." Dimitri spoke up, startling Byleth. She whipped her gaze to him but he was still focused on Rodrigue who had a similar look of surprise on his own face.

"You knew?"

"I figured it out." He replied to her question. He hadn't known for sure until she had yelled at him. The last puzzle piece had fallen into place when she had said that just because one knew the future didn't mean that they could change it.

"Please explain what you mean. You've lived through this before?" Rodrigue asked. He hadn't had the opportunity that Dimitri had to look for clues and thus was a lot less able to see the whole picture.

"Well..." Byleth began then hesitated. What could she say? Did she have to explain everything that will happen? Perhaps she should just start with her power? That might be easiest, even though she couldn't really prove it. "I have the ability to turn back the hands of time a few minutes. An hour if I really try but it's draining. I had only normally used it in battle when an enemy made an unexpected move and... and managed to kill someone. I also tried when my father died but... but I couldn't save him. Sothis said-."

"Sothis?" Rodrigue repeated in astonishment, one of his brows raising in silent question.

"Oh, yes... I, uh... This is a really long story."

"We've got time."

"Right..." Byleth looked down at her hands. She had managed to wheedle the whole story from Seteth and Rhea last time and she had told her husband Dimitri but no one else. She knew that _her_ Rhea, Seteth, and Flayn would never abandon her, they thought of her as another part of their family, and Dimitri had assured her that no matter what she was, he would love her.

She didn't know how anyone else would react, though. Would they think her a freak? Would she ruin the little bit of friendship she had managed to cultivate with this Dimitri? Would they keep her secret here with them, behind closed doors? Or would they tell everyone and ensure that she could never have a normal friendship again?

"I... was stillborn." Byleth began with a heavy sigh. Knowing Dimitri's determination, if not Rodrigue's, meant that there was no way she could get out of this without explanation. She didn't need to look up to know that Dimitri had twisted so he could look at her with her confession. "My mother was..."

No, that wasn't something they needed to know. They had no right to the knowledge that her mother wasn't human but instead a creation of Rhea's own making. Nor the fact that her father Jeralt had been given the blood of Seiros after a fatal wound he had received. They only needed to know about _her_.

"My mother wasn't strong enough to survive the birth and, apparently, neither was I. Lady Rhea, given the last wish by my mother to save me, planted the Flame crest in my heart. Somehow that managed to bring me back but not... without consequence. I have no heartbeat." Byleth looked up to Dimitri; meeting his shocked expression with a carefully even one of her own.

"How is that possible?" Rodrigue asked in a soft voice but he didn't expect an answer and none were given. Byleth instead held a hand out towards Dimitri, palm up, and after a brief moment of hesitation he covered it with his own. She slowly drew his hand towards her and pressed his palm flat against the middle of her chest where her heart would lay and they were silent while Dimitri confirmed her statement.

"It's true..." He breathed, his wide eyed-stare meeting her gaze with astonishment. Byleth gave him a sad smile that grew a bit in strength when Dimitri didn't pull his hand from hers and she didn't bother to let it go.

"According to my father's journal I never cried or laughed. Perhaps you remember when I first arrived? How I was so hard to read?" Byleth asked Dimitri and he gave a slight nod to confirm her words for Rodrigue. "I had been like that all my life. I felt emotions but they... weren't like others. They weren't even like how I feel them now. They were... muted. Dull.

"How do I explain? It would be like living off the scent of a meal that everyone else gets to fully taste and enjoy. You get the idea of it but you cannot know how it _really_ tastes until you eat a little for yourself. That was what the emotions I felt were like; a shadow of what the real things were. My whole life was like that until..."

"Until?" Dimitri prompted. Rodrigue realized that they had seemed to have forgotten him but he found that he didn't mind. The tender hand-holding between the two gave him a slight hope for the future and he also figured that Byleth would probably be a lot more forthcoming to Dimitri than she would to others. It was a sense he got from watching the two interact now and previously.

"Until the night I met you and the other house leaders. That was the first time Sothis spoke to me. That was the first time I was able to turn back time."

Silence filled the room as Byleth looked up to Dimitri with a meaningful expression. He frowned as he studied her face, gasping slightly when he understood.

"When you defended Edelgard?"

"Yes." Byleth nodded, giving a slight laugh as she remembered Sothis' scathing lecture. "I was going to be struck down by the bandit after I had leapt between him and Edelgard. Sothis yelled at me for my foolishness and then taught me how to turn back the hands of time. That was the first time."

"You really hear the voice of the Goddess?"

"I did but not anymore. Not since she and I merged."

"When your hair and eye color changed." Dimitri stated, his free hand lifting as if he was going to take a lock of hair between his fingers but stopped half-way, letting his hand drop. Byleth didn't let the slight disappointment she felt show, comforting herself with the fact that he hadn't pulled his other hand from her grip. She figured that she would enjoy the little bit of physical affection she could get now since she was sure that she wouldn't be able to in the future. Whatever feelings that had grown in Dimitri the last time she had lived through this war was certainly differently now, she was certain, so she was determined to enjoy what she could while she could.

"The war came to an end. We had won. I do hope you will understand when I say that I cannot say what will happen after that. I have made too many changes so it's possible that nothing that I remember after the war will come to be. But suffice to say that I was happy. We were all happy."

"Then how are you here now?" Rodrigue asked, startling Byleth who had started to get lost in thoughts of blissful memories. She looked up at him and hesitated, her grip on Dimitri's hand tightening into an vice-like hold. She steadied herself as she readied to reveal personal and traumatic memories. It would be the first time she had really spoken of that night since.

"...Something terrible... Something terrible happened. I tried to stop it. I rewound time so many times... and then... I don't know, I woke up just outside Garrag Mach a few months ago, the same time I woke up last time."

"What happened?" Rodrigue pressed, watching with some fascination as Byleth's expression closed as she withdrew inward. Her reaction drew his curiosity as he wondered what could have been so horrible that she refused to talk about it. He opened his mouth to ask again but was interrupted by Dimitri.

"We should probably leave the conversation there for now. It's getting late and the Professor isn't fully healed yet."

"Of course. Forgive me for keeping you for so long." Rodrigue spoke as he stood and dragged the chair back to it's original spot. He gave the two of them a slight bow and turned to leave them for the night. Dimitri waited until they were alone to voice his suspicions.

"That was the night I died." Byleth sighed and nodded; giving him the answer to his question that had been voiced as a statement. He looked down at the woman who was still sitting at his side, her eyes downcast, and watched her expression darken further when he pulled his hand from hers, only to surprise her by wrapping his arm around her shoulders so he could encourage her to use his shoulder. "You should rest. You must be tired."

A companionable silence filled the air between them as Byleth's stiffness eased and she settled herself further against him. She felt at peace in his presence but that wasn't unusual. She had always been comfortable in his presence even before their marriage so it wasn't much of a stretch that she should feel the same with his younger self.

Her heart hurt as a thought made it's way into her mind. _If only it would last._

* * *

Dimitri sat stiffly. He heard the soft even breathing that proved Byleth was dozing and he feared that the slightest movement would wake her. She had fallen into slumber so quickly he was almost amazed she hadn't fallen asleep mid-sentence during their talk earlier.

When he had raised enough courage, which he had never thought he had lacked until now, Dimitri shifted so he could first drag the sleeping woman into his lap, waiting a few moments to see if she would wake up. When she stayed asleep he carefully stood with her in his arms, holding his breath when she shifted only to let it out in a soft sigh as Byleth only sunk herself further into his grasp, her head on his shoulder as she buried her face into the side of his throat.

He felt the soft puff of her breaths against his neck and his pulse quickened as the feel of it brought a fire to his blood but he quickly squashed the burn as he strode across the room and out the door; he wouldn't allow himself to fantasize on something that may never happen.

Though holding her in his arms and feeling her warmth certainly made him want. Dimitri carried her to her room, settling her in her bed without so much as a whimper, and paused at her door to cast one more glance at the sleeping woman. There was much that he had to make up for, his treatment of the professor and his fellow classmates being one of them, but he also felt courage in the thought that whatever may come he would have a reliable ally in the professor.


	10. Chapter 10

The update schedule of these chapters are sporadic because as soon as I finish them, I post them.

I'm impatient like that but you get roughly a chapter a week, sometimes more.

Last chapter ended in fluff. This chapter is angst and fluff.

Enjoy the longest chapter yet.

-DarkDevilsAdvocate

* * *

Byleth woke to the soothing coolness of the aloe lotion being massaged into the areas she had been burned. Her eyes found Mercedes humming as she applied the medicine to Byleth's pinkened skin. She paused and smiled at the woman in bed when she noticed that she was awake.

"Oh, Professor! Good morning! I'm surprised to see you awake after all this time."

"Time?" Byleth asked, coughing to get the scratchiness out of her voice.

"Yes, you've been asleep all week."

"A week?!" Byleth shouted and struggled to sit up, stopping when Mercedes pushed her shoulders to force her to lay back down. "Mercedes, what happened while I was out?"

"His HIghness Dimitri apologized to everyone and then said we were going to take Fhirdiad." Mercedes answered as she turned back to her task in hand. "Everyone was surprised by his change of heart. He said it was thanks to You and Rodrigue."

"I didn't do anything..." Byleth murmured and focused her gaze on the ceiling of her room. She figured that since Rodrigue hadn't died, she didn't have to intervene to keep Dimitri from riding off to Enbarr in his rage and despair, but she hadn't expected him to over-come his demons on his own. She was proud of him but also a little sad that she had missed his self-improvement.

"I wouldn't say that. You've been extremely encouraging for him." Mercedes replied. She lifted Byleth's arm to inspect the skin. "Professor Manuela has said that you should be able to return to normal activity in a day or two. I've been so surprised. You've been healing really quickly. Your skin had been burnt black and had to be scrubbed off and now-."

Mercedes smiled and poked the pinkish skin of Byleth's arm. She could feel the sensation but there wasn't any pain.

"It doesn't hurt."

"That's great!" Mercedes smiled at her professor and finally released her arm, giving a slight giggle as she thought back on the events that had happened after the battle of Gronder field. "Every one has been so worried about you; Even his highness Dimitri. It was so sweet how he kept hovering while we travelled back to the monastery. Manuela had to chase him out of the infirmary tent a few times."

"Wait, what?" Byleth looked to Mercedes who was giving her a knowing smile. Mercedes had an air about her that made one think her sweet and innocent but she had an uncanny understanding of a person's nature. Her smile was because she thought that Byleth was starting to understand that Dimitri felt more for her than he did the others. Byleth's surprise was _not_ for the reason that Mercedes thought.

_Was that the change?_ Byleth thought as her hands gripped her sheets. The reason Fleche hadn't attacked Dimitri before was because he had been around people, specifically support medics, so she had had to improvise; getting him alone at the monastery. All because she had planned to save Bernadetta. All because she had been hurt. What other changes would occur because of her decisions and actions?

Mercedes studied the professor's expression, seeing something other than what she had expected, and sighed. She had to wonder why it was that the two people involved couldn't see what had been obvious to everyone else for at least a month now. Perhaps it was because they were too close to it? Unable to see the forest for the trees?

"Well, I should get going. Professor Manuela said that you're to stay here for at least one more day. You can return to teaching tomorrow, now that you're awake." Mercedes said as she stood and brushed off her lap. "I'll let everyone know that you're up. We've all been worried."

"Thank you Mercedes."

* * *

Dimitri stood frozen in front of the door, a basket in hand. Shadows lengthened and the sky dyed red and purple with the setting sun.

_Knock. Just knock. _Dimitri told himself. He had been worried when they had realized that the professor wouldn't wake and he wanted to see for himself that she was alright. Seteth and Flayn insisted that she was fine, that she would awaken on her own in due time, but he had still been plagued by worry especially since he had been the last one to have seen her awake after their talk. He felt like he should have noticed something wrong with her; otherwise why else would she have fallen into a coma? A week asleep couldn't be anything _other_ than a coma... right?

There was also another reason he had come. A couple of her words had stuck in his mind since the first month and he felt like he should finally act on it now that he felt better about himself; that he could offer her more than cruelty. Over the past few months the voices that had plagued him for five years had eased. He still heard them but they no longer had the hold over him that they once did. He felt like he could live; that he could be something more than a weapon of revenge for the dead. He wanted to be more than that. He wanted to be more for her.

They had argued a lot over the past few months and he worried that that had ruined whatever chances he had. Dimitri knew how easily hearts could change.

He took a deep breath and lifted his hand to knock once he had silently talked up his courage, pausing when the door opened. He stood there, hand raised, and stared at the professor who looked just as surprised as he felt. The silence between them slowly became awkward as it stretched on and Dimitri felt heat rising in his face. It took everything in him not to run away now.

Byleth's eyes fell on the basket and Dimitri realized he had the perfect opening.

"I thought you might be hungry. I brought food." He held the basket up and wondered at how his heart quickened at the dazzling smile she gave. How was it that he never noticed just how bright and beautiful it was?

A quick search through his memories of the past few months revealed to him that the reason was because she had never smiled like that. Not to him. Her smiles had been small, brief, and easily stolen by a harsh word. Another regret. He had been hording a lot of regrets lately.

"Thank you. Would you like to come in? We can eat together." Byleth suggested and Dimitri nodded, moving inside when Byleth stepped aside. She moved the little nightstand and the desk chair beside the bed then proceeded to sit on one side of the table while motioning towards the chair on the other for Dimitri to sit. He set the basket down and started pulling out the food he had brought for her. As he arranged it all on the little bed-side table he realized that he had brought a lot more than one person could possibly eat by themselves.

Well, Byleth might be able to. He had seen her eat several lunches in a row, each with different students, and at every party she always managed to really put the food away.

They ate in relative silence that managed to hover near awkward while still somehow being comfortable.

Dimitri was the first to break it.

"If you don't mind... may I ask how many times?" He asked, staring at her with a carefully even expression so she wouldn't guess what he was thinking. He clarified his question at her obvious confusion. "How many times did I die?"

He almost regretted the question as soon as he had asked it. The stricken expression on her face told him that this would not be an easy conversation for either of them.

"I-I don't know." Silence came between them until Byleth sighed and closed her eyes. He was confused by her actions until she started speaking again. "We were in bed for the night in Fhirdiad, just talking. You rolled on top of me."

Something she couldn't quite place told her to open her eyes and she did, the pale green orbs widening at the sight of the blush that painted Dimitri's cheeks. Byleth struggled to restrain her smile. She had forgotten how adorable his bashfulness was.

"We were married. It wasn't that shocking."

"Of course." Dimitri coughed and gave a wave of his hand to motion that Byleth continue. She gave him a small smile and closed her eyes again. It was easier to remember that way. Her smile fled as quickly as it came as she remembered that night.

"You rolled on top of me. Then you died. Stabbed through the back. That was the first time. I rewound time. The second time I let you know that someone was in the room and you began to reach for Areadbhar. You died. I rewound time. I grabbed my sword. A blade his my shoulder. I swung. They came back. You were there. You died. I rewound time. I tossed the blanket. A blade sliced through it easily. You pushed me out of the way. You died. I rewound time."

Dimitri swallowed thickly as he listened to Byleth list off all the ways he had died. It was tough just hearing it, especially when the emotion of that night, those many deaths, weighed on Byleth and her voice strained with the effort to keep speaking. Even behind closed eyes tears began to form, a few slipping free and racing down her cheek, while her hands were held in a white-knuckle fist that shook with every word.

"I grabbed my sword. I swung. There was a clash. A flash. I couldn't see. You were there. You died. I rewound time. I rolled over you to grab Areadbhar. I blocked the attack. It came again. You leapt on the intruder. A scuffle. The intruder was wounded but you died. I rewound time."

Dimitri noticed the pattern. Each of his deaths had been because he had been protecting Byleth, taking the fatal hit himself to keep her safe. It wasn't funny but he wanted to laugh because that sounded like him; throwing his life away for someone he loved. He remained quiet, though, and listened to Byleth recount the many ways she tried to save him. Her words were gaining a strain as she continued through the difficult sorrow that threatened to drown her. How many times had she said he had died? Seven? Eight?

"I grabbed my sword. I swung. I swung and swung. I couldn't stop. I had to be sure. I couldn't let you die again. I _couldn't_." Her breathing was rapid and her words were halting as she worked to keep the sobs from breaking up her words. "I killed him. I saved you. I killed him and saved you. So why? _Why?_ Why did you die? Why did someone else come and take you away?!"

"Hey, hey, It's over. It's done." Dimitri soothed as he moved from his chair to sit on the bed beside her and pull her into a hug. His touch broke whatever damn had been holding her tears back and she sobbed as she clung to him. He felt awkward, he wasn't very good at dealing with people who were crying, but he knew he couldn't leave her like this. He had been the one to bring it up after all. His own damn curiosity had caused this. He should be used to it, though, since the people he cared about only ever seemed to get hurt around him.

She deserved better.

"I owe you an apology." He murmured after she had cried herself dry and her sobs had quieted to the occasional hiccup. She stayed strangely still as she waited to find out why he felt that he had to say sorry. "I shouldn't have asked."

"No. If anyone should know, It's you. Besides, fair is fair."

"Fair is fair?"

"You've told me about your past; about what happened in Duscur, remember?" Byleth responded as she pulled back enough to grab a napkin and wipe her face with it. She was sure her face was a mess after crying her despair out. She felt better after her purge, though. She had cried during her first month of her return to the past but it had been short and quiet so as not to worry anyone. It hadn't been as satisfying. It didn't release the stress and sorrow that had built up like this.

Dimitri's presence did wonders to help soothe the traumatic wound on her heart.

Byleth looked up at Dimitri, ready to thank him for hearing her out and supporting her in her lancing of the emotional injury, but paused when she realized that she recognized the expression on his face. He was closing himself off; readying to retreat. She knew it from the few times that he had a terrible day that he didn't want to burden her with.

She remembered the day that she had managed to wiggle some time off and gone to Fhirdiad to spend a few days with Dimitri between his reform work. He had returned with the same shuttered look he was bearing now. She had been worried about him then and had pestered him to tell her what had happened causing him to snap and yell at her. The shock they had both felt after had been enough to release him from his inward spiral. He had apologized profusely and explained what had him such a mood: a building that had been damaged during the war was being repaired but something had gone wrong. Maybe the foundation had been weakened or a wall they didn't know was damaged finally failed but whatever the cause, it had collapsed and trapped almost everyone inside. Many of them had been recovered but others...

Dimitri had told her about how after hours of moving rubble he held the body of a child no older than 10 as he died in his arms.

Byleth was dragged out of her memories at movement by her side and she reacted more on instinct than on actual thought; grabbing Dimitri's arm to keep him there beside her. His gaze fell on her and she knew that she had made the correct decision.

"Why are you leaving?" She asked him. Dimitri didn't reply but she had a good idea as to why. "Tears are not always a bad thing. I needed this release. So don't leave me. Please."

She was surprised by Dimitri's hug, his grip almost crushing, but she didn't complain as she held returned it with all her strength. Shared pain was easier to carry and Dimitri had been burdened by his a lot longer than she had been by hers. Byleth didn't know how long they stayed that way but the darkness of the night was thick when they finally pulled apart. She had to stumbled around in the dark briefly to find and light a candle, placing it on the nightstand before returning to her seat next to Dimitri. She so desperately wanted to hold him again but restrained herself. There was a chance that things would change, that he would come to love someone else, and she refused to chain him to her by forcing her feelings on him. She wanted him to have the freedom of choice.

They sat in silence, simply watching the flicker of the candle light playing on the walls. She felt that the darkness that had overtaken Dimitri earlier had faded so if he moved to leave now she wouldn't stop him. She had just been desperate earlier because she had the feeling that if left on his own he would wallow and drown in his own despair. Just as he helped her, she wanted to help him.

"Professor." Byleth was suddenly aware of just how close they were, her nose almost brushing his when she turned her head to face him. When had he gotten so close? "May I ask something?"

"Of course."

Dimitri's heart thundered against his ribs as he considered his question. Would it be inappropriate? Would he be stepping over a line? The words from that first month that had stuck with him had been repeated again this night. They had been married. That meant she had accepted whatever proposal he had made in that other timeline. Doubt plagued him and he hesitated. It had taken him enough courage already just to knock on her door originally.

"Dimiri?"

"Professor, did you love your husband?"

What? How could he ask that of her? She had just made up her mind to let him live his life and have his feelings grow naturally, even if it was for someone else. It would hurt to see the person she loved most be with someone else but his happiness was much more important than her own. After everything he had been through she figured he deserved whatever joy he could get.

"Deeply." Byleth answered truthfully. She had promised herself on the day that he had proposed in her other life that she would never lie to him and she wasn't going to start now. "I always will. But you don't have to hold yourself to the man I knew. You should find your own happiness without being defined by a future that I remember."

"What do you mean?"

"I have said it before that the choices I made will have an effect on the future we will see. You can cut your own destiny." She told him with a sad smile. She interpreted the shocked expression on his face from her mimicking the words he had told Edelgard years ago when they were kids, not realizing that he had repeated them to Edelgard in the future that Byleth remembered.

She was wrong.


	11. Chapter 11

This is a direct continuation of the last chapter.

Work and Sickness has this coming out later than I would like.

I just want to let you know that I read every review and they bring me so much joy.

I really hope this story gives you as much happiness as your reviews and encouragement gives me.

Stay healthy and please Enjoy.

-DarkDevilsAdvocate

* * *

Dimitri stared at Byleth in surprise. She admitted to loving him but was determined to let him go and create his own path if that was what made him happy.

She didn't realize that he wanted to walk that path with _her_.

"Did He- _I_\- never explain?" He asked, knowing the answer instantly by the confused look on her face. He figured that his other self, the one that had been her husband, had probably told her that he loved her on such a regular basis that he had never needed to tell her when he had _started_.

"Explain what?"

"Do you remember what my wish was at the goddess tower?" The seeming change in topic threw Byleth off. How did their conversation go from cutting one's own fate to the goddess tower? Where was he going with this?

It took her a few moments to remember for as long ago it was for Dimitri, it was even longer for her. The first memory that popped up had been the morning he had proposed but she knew that wasn't what he was talking about. It hadn't happened for him yet. When she remembered the words he had said the night after the ball she looked up at him with a confused tilt to her head.

"You wished that there was a world where the strong didn't have to trample on the weak."

"Ah, I was actually thinking about my _other_ wish." Dimitri clarified. Even in the faint candlelight she could see the slight color on his cheeks but she willingly ignored it as she tried to remember what other wish he had made. Had there been one? Why did it have to be so long ago?! She wasn't so old her memory was fading already, right?

Oh.

_OH._

_That_ wish. The wish that they would always be together. The slight blush darkened when he noticed that she finally understood what he was starting to get at. His words came out in a rush that he stumbled over.

"I-It was my way of confessing. But then you didn't _say _anything! So I panicked and-and-."

"And turned it into a joke." She finished with awe. She hadn't been familiar enough with her own emotions to know how she felt about his sudden confession at the time. She hadn't known what to say in response because she had been his professor and Seteth had already talked to her about appropriate behavior; setting a standard for the students. Despite her sudden tenure as a teacher, she knew that starting a relationship with a student did not fall under 'appropriate behavior'. She had meant to turn him down but something in her really didn't want to completely cut him off. If he wanted to he could have pursued her after he graduated, if he didn't find someone else before-hand, but he had said that he was joking before she could voice any of this and she had scolded him gently for an inappropriate joke. If he had pulled the same thing on someone else, someone who had been more sure of her feelings towards him, his words could seriously wound.

This was a new development for Byleth. She had always assumed that his feelings for her had grown during the war and they had solidified completely after his proposal; much like her own had. Even when he had been in the academy as her student she had found him adorable and helpful but hadn't had any strong feelings towards him. Of course, she hadn't had _any_ strong feelings at all then.

"Since then? You've liked me since then?" She asked as she held her hands over her heart as if to protect it from the words she dreaded most. She didn't think she could bear it if he said that he was just kidding like he had the last time, at the tower. She knew her heart now but she had to be sure of his.

"A boyhood crush on teacher." He answered as he looked away from her focused gaze, embarrassed by the admission of his own feelings. It was only because she had said he was her husband in an alternate timeline and confessed to loving him deeply that had given him the courage to say the words now. Had he always lacked such courage? He didn't know anymore. Maybe he had always been such a coward and letting go, descending into madness, had been an easy escape from the reality of the world.

He didn't want to live like that anymore. Byleth made him want to try. After everything she had been through she was still marching forward, still facing the future, still willing to give up what was precious to her for the happiness of others. She made him want to hope.

He sincerely hoped that she wouldn't turn him down.

"Since then." Byleth repeated and Dimitri's unease increased. He wanted her to say something, _anything_, else. He had wanted her to know how long he had liked her so that she knew that whatever she felt for him would be willingly returned so she didn't need to hold back. Still, her silence was as uncomfortable as it had been then but this time he knew he couldn't say it was a joke again. He didn't _want_ to play it off as just a badly timed jest. He wanted her to _know_. He wanted even more desperately for her to say or do _something._

He turned to face her at the feel of her hand on his shoulder and, as if she had read his mind, Byleth leaned up to place a single chaste kiss to his lips. She was stopped from her retreat after the kiss by his hand curling around the back of her neck and pulling her back into another. It was inexpert and a little sloppy but Byleth happily returned the kiss, wrapping her arms around him in encouragement.

Kiss followed after kiss until they were both breathless. It was undoubtedly late with the flickering of the candlelight as their only source of light. She knew she needed to distract them both before it got to the point that neither would get much sleep that night. This was technically a new relationship, after all.

"Dimitri, I want to take you somewhere tomorrow." Byleth told him as she slipped from his lap. When had she managed to get there? She couldn't remember. She felt Dimitri's grip tighten on her hips as if he didn't want her to leave but he let her go, watching her retreat until she was standing before him.

"Where?" He asked, feeling a slight bit of suspicion when she only smiled at him. He sighed and stood as well, taking a moment to cup her cheek and enjoying the fact that he could do that now without worrying about if she would deny him. "Very well. Shall I meet you in front of your room?"

"How about in the dining hall that way we can eat breakfast before-hand." She suggested as she leaned into his touch. She pulled away reluctantly so he could go and Dimitri headed towards the door; pausing with his hand on the handle so he could wish Byleth a good night before he slipped outside and disappeared into the darkness.

* * *

"Why the basket?" Dimitri asked Byleth as they walked down a path that was fairly deserted otherwise, shaded against the early afternoon light by monastery walls on either side. He recognized the wicker container as the same one he had brought to her room last night but he didn't mention that part since they were also joined by Dedue who insisted on accompanying them. Dimitri had been a bit hesitant, wondering if he should find something else for his retainer to do, but Byleth had agreed to having Dedue along which told the prince that this wasn't going to be a romantic outing.

"You'll see." Byleth smiled enigmatically. Dimitri had never pegged the professor as someone who liked playing the mysterious role, but then she had never really needed to before since it had been all natural.

"Oh Professor! Good morning!" Ashe called, standing up from a chair that had been placed next to a wooden door that Dimitri had to assume was locked. The eyes of the grey-haired boy widened when he noticed Dimitri and Dedue behind her. "Your Highness! G-good morning."

"Good morning." He greeted, watching with some confusion as the professor held her hand out towards the younger boy who placed a key ring in it.

"Go get breakfast Ashe. I'll lock up when I'm done and Sylvain arrives."

"Actually, Felix is taking the next shift."

"Is he? Why did they switch?" She asked, getting a shrug in answer. Byleth sighed and unlocked the door as Ashe bowed to Dimitri before retreating the way they had come. She moved inside the room, followed by Dimitri and Dedue. The guys instantly fell into defensive stances when they saw who else was in the room.

"Good morning Professor."

"Good morning Randolph! I'm sorry I haven't been by lately." She told the man as she set down the basket on a little table inside. The enemy general looked up at who else was with the professor and stood from the chair he had been sitting in, the book he had been reading clattered on the ground, so he could get into a defensive stance as well.

"What is he doing here?" Two voices called out at the same time, both brimming with hostility.

Byleth quickly shoved herself between the two men that were glaring at each other, her arms outstretched in both directions to keep them at bay. Her gaze was focused on Dimitri in a glare that was easy to interpret.

_Let me handle this._

Dimitri really didn't want to relax in the presence of someone who had been an enemy some months before hand, an enemy that he had thought had been _killed_, but he stood up out of his stance. He would trust her.

She turned to face Randolph as soon as she saw that Dimitri had relaxed his stance, resting her hands on her hips as she glared at the enemy general.

"General Randolph! That is no way for a guest to act!"

"You've already called me a POW why are you calling me a guest now!" Randolph yelled back petulantly and Dimitri had to sigh at how easy it was for Byleth to get others to sing to her tune. Who else could convince someone who was half-mad into a week long game of hide and seek? Now she had an enemy general acting in a childish temper tantrum.

"Are you saying you haven't been comfortable here?"

"That's not it!"

"I hope Fleche isn't this ungrateful."

"Fleche? Did you say Fleche?" Randolph asked, taking the few steps to close the distance between him and the professor, ignoring how Dimitri and Dedue stiffened at his approach.

"Yes, Did they not-?" Byleth started then stopped with a heavy sigh. No, they wouldn't, would they? Felix wouldn't have been interested in supervising a familial visit, you never knew what you would get with Sylvain, and Ashe would have but seemed like someone that would want to be sure before hand and ask permission. With Byleth out the past week, he wouldn't have had the chance to ask. "Alright, We'll take you to go see your sister."

"Are you sure that's wise?" Dedue asked as he watched the excited enemy with suspicion.

"That's what I have two very capable guards for." She replied with a smile, indicating both him and Dimitri. Without much argument, the three men followed Byleth as she led them to another room, unlocking it with another key on the ring she had received from Ashe earlier. As soon as the door opened a yell warned Byleth of the attack before it hit.

"Dimitri!" Byleth shouted, drowning out the startled yells of Dedue and Randolph, memories of that night replaying in her head. The prince has moved almost on instinct so that he was between her and the broken wooden chair leg that shattered over his upraised arm. It hadn't done anything but sting a little but the way Byleth had screamed and grabbed onto him, he knew that what had happened wasn't what she had seen.

"I'm alright." He assured, turning to face her only after Randolph entered and placed himself between them and Fleche, talking her down from her aggression.

"I thought you were dead!" The girl's eyes watered at the sight of her brother and she hugged him tightly.

Their reunion was forgotten as Dimitri rested his hands on Byleth's shoulders, feeling her shaking. He felt somewhat guilty but he had no doubt he would have done it again if it meant that she didn't get hurt. Byleth took a deep breath to calm her nerves. Once she had calmed down and could take a moment to think, she realized why she had reacted so strongly. It had been her own fault.

Byleth had been through many battles and had seen countless deaths. She had even witness her own father being murdered before her. It was Dimitri's death that caused her the most pain and it was most likely because she had seen it so many times in so many ways. It was her own fault.

"Professor, are you alright? I'm here. We're fine. Everything is fine." Dimitri soothed, taking her hand into his and running his thumb over the back of her hand. When her shaking had stopped she gave him a small, grateful smile.

"Thank you. I'm alright now." She told him. Once he was sure that she was indeed well he gave her a narrow-eyed glare.

"So would you care to explain how a man I _saw_ you stab is still alive and a... 'guest' of the monastery?" He asked in a carefully neutral tone.

"Oh, well, you see I had been covering my dagger, the one I always carry on my belt, with a paralytic salve I made from a root."

"Why?"

"Because I remembered that she wanted revenge and I realized it was him when I saw him again. I recognized the family resemblance. I didn't want our people to be the only one that ended with a happy ending... I didn't want you to regret."

Dimitri's grip tightened on her hand, not enough to be painful, but enough that she felt it. His expression was unreadable and for a moment Byleth was worried that she had offended him. Her worries were put at ease when he gave her a subtle smile.

"Only you would consider something like that important." He murmured with a soft chuckle. It looked like he was about to say more but they were interrupted by the door behind them opening.

"Fleche! I found a new tea that I think you'll really like- oh... Hi Professor. Dimitri. Dedue? What are you all doing here?" Sylvain asked as he came to a sudden stop, surprised to see so many people in a room where he had expected one.

"Sylvain! So is this why you changed your guard shift with Felix? So you can play around with our _guest_?" Byleth asked with a smile that was somehow sinister and Sylvain felt that if he didn't answer correctly that there was a good chance that he was going to be in trouble and probably end up with so much extra work.

"What? Of course not. I just wanted to make her feel at home and show that we're not really bad guys." Sylvain said with a smile and a careless shrug. His smile faltered a moment when Randolph moved to be between him and Fleche, glaring at the red-headed man like the protective older brother he was. "Since we're all here, how about we have tea."

The rest of the visit went by easier, even with the tense atmosphere. Somehow Sylvain managed to lighten everyone's mood with his enthusiasm despite the fact that the enemy general kept his sister away from the flirtatious man any chance he could get, moving between them whenever the teasing man got to close. The hours passed and Sylvain took his leave first, waving enthusiastically to Fleche who returned it with a shy smile and wave of her own while Randolph's glare followed the other man out.

They allowed Randolph and Fleche to say their goodbyes when the young girl surprised Dimitri by approaching him to slip into a bow.

"I'm really really sorry." She apologized, her hands gripping her thighs as she stared hard at the ground. "I'm so very sorry."

Dimitri looked from Fleche to Byleth for some sort of explanation at the sudden change. Even if they had been if not _friendly _at least amiable to each other the past couple hours that didn't mean he had expected an apology. They were still enemies, prisoners of war, no matter how Byleth trussed up the term.

"When we defeat the empire you may be the last and only ruling body of all Fodlan. You will be the deciding voice for everything." She told him and he finally understood. Though he understood that she had only been attacking what she considered and enemy she had, in fact, attempted regicide which was punishable by death.

"That's not necessary. You're for-."

"Don't." Byleth interrupted before Dimitri could finish. "Your words carry a lot of weight. You must give everyone the courtesy of considering them before you speak."

Dimitri contemplated her words. She was right. What he said now could affect their lives and how everyone would treat them in the future. He had to remember that they won't be the only ones he will have to judge and he shouldn't just pardon them all without reflecting on the crimes and punishments.

"I understand."

They escorted Randolph back to his designated room and passed the key ring over to Felix who scoffed at the sight of the little party. With the sun setting the two men escorted Byleth back to her room. Dimitri returned to his own room considering the day and everything that had happened.

He had a lot to think about; the future, his role, the war, relationships, and the battle coming up soon.

They would soon be taking back Fhirdiad.


	12. Chapter 11 and a half

Since my last chapter took so long to come out here's a half chapter apology.

I'm really sorry and please enjoy.

-DarkDevilsAdvocate.

* * *

The afternoon was bright and lovely as Annette, Mercedes, and Ashe sat in the the cafeteria, greeting Ingrid and Sylvain as they took a seat at the table with them.

"How are you?"

"Pretty good but now Randolph glares at me whenever I have to guard him." Sylvain lamented dramatically, grunting as Ingrid elbowed him sharply in the side.

"That's because you won't stop flirting with his sister."

"I'm not _flirting_! I'm just making sure she feels comfortable and at home!"

"Speaking of flirting, have you seen the Professor and his Highness?" Mercedes inturrupted the pending argument smoothly with a small giggle as Annette nodded in agreement.

"Oh, yes! They've been spending alot of time together lately! Do you think he finally confessed?"

"Do you really think that he likes her like that?" Ashe asked uncertainly. He wasn't as sure about the nature of their relationship as the others seemed to be.

"It's obvious he has a crush on her." Sylvain answered with a wave of his hand. "But I'm not so sure if he said anything or that she feels the same way towards him."

"He is the type to keep his feelings to himself so as not to trouble others." Ingrid added. They all looked to each other in silence before Annette stood with a slap of the table.

"That's it! We're going to find out if they've gotten anywhere in their relationship!"

"How?" Mercedes tilted her head when she asked.

"We'll look for evidence!"

"We're going to follow them, aren't we?" Ashe sighed heavily, already knowing the answer.

"Yes!"

"Why do you all care about the boar prince's relationship? It's no one's business." Felix asked as he approached the table. He only overheard the last part of the conversation but that had been enough. They acted like it was a tale come to life.

"You don't have to come if you don't want to Felix." Sylvain stood, followed by Mercedes, Ashe, and Ingrid. Felix clicked his tongue and strode away from the group that decided that they would look for and follow Dimitri and Byleth.

They found the two walking through the main hall towards the marketplace, talking quietly together. The group of stalkers were a little too far to hear what was being said but they watched carefully for any clues and whispered to each other with each one: a touch to the shoulder, a giggle, a lot of little glances.

"They're _totally_ flirting." Sylvain pointed out, literally pointing when Byleth gave a soft laugh and tapped at Dimitri's upper arm.

"They're coming! Hide!" Annette hissed as she pulled Sylvain behind the door where the others hid as Dimitri and Byleth moved up the stairs and towards the stables. Several heads peeked around the corner in time to see the two they were following disappear around the corner on the far end, towards the gazebo. They had to sprint to catch up, taking a few moments so their heavy breathing wouldn't give them away as they slipped around the hedges to watch the two walk past grass and cobblestone through the gate towards the dorm rooms.

"Ooh, racy." The red-haired male murmured, gaining a smack to the back of his head at the implied innuendo.

"Don't be crass." Ingrid scolded as she withdrew her hand after hitting Sylvain, turning her gaze back to their prince and professor. "You keep saying that they're flirting but so far it appears they haven't done more than talk and walk. They haven't held hands or hugged or _anything_."

"Maybe they're just shy?" Ashe suggested to turn their attention away from their squable and back to their task at hand.

"They're headed back to the rooms. Maybe we'll see definitive proof there." Annette added. She set her expression into a serious one and raced forward towards the gate that seperated them from the dorms, the others following her lead.

* * *

"Do you think they've realized yet that we know they're following us?" Byleth asked as they stopped at the base of the steps infront of her door. Her smile widened at the heavy sigh Dimitri gave.

"No otherwise they would have given up already. They won't get what they want if we _know_ they're there."

"It's a shame. I was kind of hoping for a good-bye kiss."

"The one earlier wasn't satifying enough?" Dimitri grinned as he watched the slight color come to her cheeks. Her emotions were easy to read and came readily to her face. He had thought she was cool before with ehr stoicism but now, knowing her emotion and seeing them for himself, he thought she was beautiful and bright.

"Good _night_, Dimitri." Byleth laughed lightly. She gave him a small wave before moving to enter her room, pausing to glance where the rest of her class lay in waiting, seeing thier disappointed gazes. They had expected to find something during their half-day investigation but Byleth and Dimitri weren't ready to give them anything. Their relationship wasn't really defined yet, still in it's infancy, and they were both worried that outside interferance would put unnessary pressure on them while they were still figuring things out.

Dimitri moved down the path towards the dormatory stairs that led to the second floor, pausing when he noticed Felix standing in the way.

"I'll never understand what she sees in you." He commented with a frown and a shrug, glaring up at the prince.

"I'm not sure what you mean."

"Gazebo." Felix stated simply, watching Dimitri's eye widen breifly in shock.

"How did you-?" They had thought they had been pretty clever in forcing their group of stalkers to race to catch up after walking through the stables so they could take a few moments at the Gazebo where no one was around to share a private kiss. Neither he nor Byleth had seen any evidence of someone around so how had Felix known?

"Whatever. It's none of my business. Just don't break her heart, boar prince." Felix shrugged again and moved past Dimitri without a backwards glance. Dimitri could only watch him go.

* * *

"It's a shame we couldn't find anything." Annette lamented with a sigh as she stretched her arms across the dining table they had claimed for themselves.

"I don't know. It seems that they were much closer than they were before." Mercedes pointed out as she gave her friend a gentle pat on the shoulder.

"That doesn't mean they're in a relationship though." Ingrid spoke up with a sigh of her own, Ashe and Sylvain nodding in agreement.

"I guess we just have to wait and see."


	13. Chapter 12

This chapter was even harder to write than Chapter 11. Ugh.

We're getting closer to the end of the war. This story will continue after the war.

I will try to keep up with updates but with the Holidays they may end up being a little late occasionally. I apologize in advance.

Happy Holidays and Please Enjoy.

-DarkDevilsAdvocate

* * *

Byleth walked the stone halls of Fhirdiad castle as she visited memories that had yet to happen at this point. It felt a little weird to know that in this hall Dedue and Gilbert had an animated debate that neither of them remembered or that at that corner Felix had taken a chunk of stone from the wall on accident.

She felt crazy sometimes but having Dimitri and Rodrigue's complete confidences helped. They had gone over the plan for the siege of Fhirdiad where Byleth had pointed out all the defenses of the capitol. Gilbert and Catherine understood that the professor's standing had changed somehow when they made suggestions and _both_ Dimitri and Rodrigue looked to Byleth for her counsel. She knew the knights couldn't understand but that was because she hadn't told them anything. She didn't want anyone else to know beyond the two people she had told. Rodrigue still cornered her occasionally to ask questions but it wasn't anything she couldn't handle.

Well, there was one question that she avoided whenever Rodrigue asked. She would make an excuse or say she was busy and slip away from him, running away to put as much space between them as possible. It was whenever he asked if she had used her powers since she had returned to the past.

The truth was that she had_ not_ used her powers since she reunited with the others. Fear kept her from trying. She was afraid that her power wouldn't work when she needed it or that it would slip from under her control and she would wake up on the riverbed again. She had gained so much in such a short time that she didn't think she could go through it all again.

"Professor." Byleth looked up, drawn out of her rumination by the sound of Dimitri calling her. It took her a moment to realize that she had followed the path she had numerous times before, ending in front of Dimitri's bedroom. How must it have looked with him standing at the end of the hall and seeing Byleth standing outside his bedroom. "Have you grown weary of the festivities?"

"I was going to ask you the same." Just earlier that day they had taken Fhirdiad and the citizens had cheered Dimitri. Unlike last time, Byleth had been able to give him a hug as he cried at the support of his people. He had been so sure that they must have hated him, just as he hated himself, that their ready acceptance of him had been a surprise. They had a large celebration afterwards which the others were enjoying quite gleefully.

"It's not that I have grown weary... More that I find it difficult to be around everyone at the moment."

There was a moment of silence as Dimitri reflected on where he had just been. Just as Byleth had left the festivities to wander the castle, Dimitri had left to visit his family. It had been nearly five years since he had last been able to visit. He finally decided to open up to the woman that had come to be so dear.

"I have just returned from visiting the graves of my loved ones. It had been a long while since I left flowers. I was always terribly afraid of going near there... But I could not stay away forever."

He walked closer until he was standing before her; close enough that he could reach out and touch her. He didn't. Not yet. He had something he had to say before he allowed himself to yield to his desires.

"You have taught me something important, Professor."

"Humor?" She asked in a joking tone that caused him to laugh. She had always liked the sound of his laughter; he seemed to get her dry sense of humor. Of course, he always laughed at Alois' jokes as well so it was hard to say if she was _actually_ funny or not.

"You never let up, do you? No, what I am referring to is far more valuable. How should I put this... Perhaps it is most accurate to say that... You taught me how to live. If you and I had not reunited on that fateful day, I am certain I would have died a fruitless death on the battlefield. I would have foolishly challenged a horde of foes and, in doing so, needlessly sacrificed the lives of my friends and myself."

"I wouldn't have let you."

"I know. I will always be grateful to you for it. Because of you I have returned to my rightful place. I struggle with what to say, when I know well that words are not enough to express my gratitude. You saved me from the darkness... And guided me back to the light. Thank you, Professor. With all that I am, I thank you."

"Are you happy?" Byleth asked, knowing the answer but feeling she should ask anyway. Though there have been significant changes from the last time she had lived through this, feelings were harder to see changes too.

"That... Is a hard question to answer. I still do not believe I deserve happiness. These hands of mine have taken so many lives... Nobles and commoners. Adults and children. Perhaps a day will come when I have finally atones for my sins... But such a day is not possible until after the war is over. But I digress... For tonight, our only focus should be to bask in our victory. After that, we must prepare for our battle with the Empire."

Dimitri sighed as he thought of all the work that would soon be upon them. It was exhausting just thinking about it.

"To start, we must absorb the Kingdom knights taken by the Dukedom into our own forces and reshuffle our troops. The lords will need to help purge our territory of Imperial forces, and I will use my authority as king to gather forces from various regions. And we'll have to ask the merchants to lend us the funds we require... Oh, and we must request delivery of supplies at once..."

"That sounds like a lot of work."

"Heh... Just thinking about it all makes my head spin. There is much to do but it is all critical if we hopes to stand a chance against the Empire."

"You know, you can call me by my name when it's just the two of us." Byleth brought up, effectively changing the subject, bringing the topic of conversation away from the Empire and Edelgard and back to them. "I'm not technically your professor anymore."

"You will always be our professor. Our Beloved-." Dimitri paused and considered his words, particularly the last one. It was perfect and judging by the her expression it was one that she had heard before. He must have come to the same conclusion as his other self: her husband. "Yes,_ my_ beloved."

Dimitri moved closer to her, watching in fascination as she blushed and she looked up at him in anticipation. He found it intriguing how expressive she was now. Back when he had first tried confessing at the goddess tower she had been so hard to read but now he could easily tell that she was waiting for him to kiss her which he happily complied with.

As it had the first time and many times following, kissing Byleth lit a fire of desire in his blood and he wanted to act on it; to take her in his arms and march right to the nearest bed. They were right in front of his room. Would she accept it? Would she insist on waiting until they were married? How could he tell? Maybe he could test her reaction somehow, like opening his door. If she pulled away from him then he would know that she didn't want the same thing he did.

He placed several light pecks to her lips as he thought, pausing at the creak of his door opening and he pulled back in surprise. Byleth's smug smile was all it took for him to realize that she had been the one to open the door, effectively derailing his plan.

"You didn't need to test me. You could have just asked." She told him as she reached out and took his hands in her own, holding them to her. He marveled at the warmth that spread through him at just the touch of her hands. He leaned down and kissed her which she accepted readily and he _knew_.

"Byleth, I lo-."

"Don't!" He was paused by her shout and her hands over his mouth, dropping his own as if they were on fire.. He tried not to be hurt by her denial of his verbal affection. She had readily accepted his physical affection, so why was she denying his words? He received his answer as she continued. "If there's even the _slightest_ chance that you could grow to love another, don't say those words."

Ah, of course. She knew him and knew that should he devote himself to her his honor would not allow for anything else. Even if his heart would get swayed towards another in the future, he would give up that happiness to keep to the silent vow that those three words carried. Other nobles may not have qualms about taking mistresses but Dimitri's honor would never allow him to be with someone who was not his significant other. Even now, after everything they've been through, she was still trying to protect his heart.

He didn't want to tell her that it was alright because they weren't married yet. Not that he didn't plan for that to happen in the future. He had been her husband once before, hadn't he? There shouldn't be any reason she would refuse him this time either. Right now, though, he just wanted to savor her company and have her relish his.

In a fit of childishness that he blamed _entirely_ on Byleth, Dimitri licked her palm; causing her to yelp and yank her hands back in surprise.

"I _love _you Byleth. I always will." He leaned forward and kissed her before she could protest, dragging her against him. She seemed to hesitate for a moment then wrapped her arms around him, returning his intimacy with enthusiasm. Dimitri lifted her up easily and carried her into his room, kicking the door shut behind them.

* * *

Byleth woke, still groggy, to the grey light of predawn where the sun hadn't quite breached the horizon. She blinked a few times to get the sleep out of her eyes and looked around to look for what woke her. Dimitri sat on the edge of the bed, dressed only in pants and she took a moment to marvel at the sinewy muscles of his back, dotted with old scars and new scratches. She felt a little embarrassed at the sight.

"What is it Dedue?" Dimitri asked and Byleth realized that the retainer knocking on the door must have been what had woken her. She didn't see Dedue which meant that he was still on the other side of the closed door. She was glad for that because she wasn't exactly in a state to be seen.

"I apologize for waking you so early, Your Highness, but an express messenger came early this morning from the Alliance."

"An express messenger? What could Claude be playing at? I'll get dressed and head towards the reception hall. Will you notify Rodrigue and Gilbert?"

"Yes, Your Highness. Shall I also wake the professor?"

"No, I'll inform her and we'll meet you and the others there." Dimitri replied with a small smile as he glanced over his shoulder at the woman they were talking about, reaching out to cup her cheek as his thumb brushed back and forth as if he reveled in the feel of her skin.

"You know what this letter is about?"

"Of course I do. And so will you in an hour or so." Byleth replied with a sly smile as she moved to stand and search for her clothes. She was distinctly aware of Dimitri's piercing gaze on her as she moved, taking in every aspect of her bare body. It was rather thrilling to be so desired.

"You're not going to tell me?" Dimitri asked, noting how her smile widened a bit more and knew the answer to his question.

"Now where is the fun in that? Now, we should go before Dedue sends a search party after us."

* * *

The battle of Derdriu was quick and decisive with the forces of Faerghus taking the Imperial army by surprise, crushing them against the remnants of the Alliance army. It had been decided that they would help not only because it would be advantageous for the Kingdom in the future but because the Alliance needed assistance. Byleth knew that Dimitri would be a good and righteous king when he said that; She would support him with everything she had.

It was a shame that Arundel died so quickly, though. Dimitri lamented the wasted opportunity to get information.

"For now, let's rejoice in our victory." Byleth plied. They had just struck a pivotal blow against the Empire that would only be a boon to kingdom efforts in the future.

"Teach is absolutely right. We should take this rare opportunity to let off some tension." Claude added with an easy smile as he approached the two, noting to himself how close they stood to each other. A single side-step and their shoulders would touch.

"It's been a long time, Claude. I am glad to see that you're safe."

"Same. I haven't seen you since the nightmare that was Gronder." Claude rubbed at an old wound absently and Byleth frowned. She had missed how the battle at Gronder had ended since she had been knocked out by the pain of being literally on fire.

"Are you alright? Have your wounds healed?" Byleth watched as Claude's eyebrows shot up in startlement as if just realizing something and he stared hard at her unmarked face. The last time he had seen her, her skin had blackened and peeling.

"I should ask you that question, teach. You were taken from the field with bad burns. You must have some incredible healers. Your skin isn't even sunburned." He pointed out, watching as Dimitri moved slightly between them when the prince had noticed his hand raise as if to touch the professor. He rested his hand on his hip instead, tilting his head as he gave Dimitri a sly smile. He knew that if anyone could bring Dimitri around it would be Byleth, he just hadn't realized just how close their relationship would get. "Anyway, you really did come to help us... You must be a bunch of soft-hearted suckers, eh?"

"If you really felt that way, you would not have set up a defensive battle in the hopes we would come. It worked out only because we made it in time... Were you really so confident that we would answer the call?"

"Of course. I knew you wouldn't hesitate to put yourself second and come running to our aid." The only one that could see Byleth's proud smile was Claude as Dimitri had placed her at his back when he had stepped between them.

_So they're not just _close. _They're acting like a couple. Protective and Proud. _Claude thought to himself, careful not to let it show on his face.

"You know him well."

"You and I are cut from different cloth. I wouldn't make a move unless I could gain something from it. You've always been just the opposite. And, of course, I've always been fond of taking dangerous risks. After all, I sent that express messenger before you had even recaptured the Kingdom capital. It was riskier than usual, I'll give you that, but it was the only card I had to play so I took the gamble."

"You cross too many dangerous bridges for my liking."

"I know, I know. But... That ends today."

"What do you mean?" Dimitri asked. Claude saw that Dimitri was surprised, which was expected, but Byleth was not. Had she somehow anticipated that he would give up being the leader of the alliance? He figured that she was smart but he didn't think she was that clever. Could he surprise her still?

"Here, take this. Use it however you see fit." No, Byleth still showed no signs of shock. It was a little disappointing because it took all the fun out of Claude's actions.

"The legendary bow, Failnaught... Isn't this the Hero's Relic of House Riegan? Hold, Claude. This must be one of your jokes. You cannot truly intend to part with this..."

"It's not a joke. As of today, the Leicester Alliance is no more."

"What are you planning, Claude?" Dimitri asked humorlessly, crossing his arms and Byleth stepped up to stand beside him once again. His movements had partially blocked her view.

"If you're going to lead Fodlan then the Alliance lords will follow you. Back in the day, the Alliance split off from the Kingdom. I'm just putting us back together again. Oh, and I've already gained the support of the other lords at the roundtable conference, so you can stop looking at me like I'm crazy. All that's left is for me to officially step down as the leader of the Alliance."

"Will you be returning back to Almyra?" Byleth asked innocently enough but still managed to catch Claude off guard. He hadn't expected to get the tables turned on him so effectively.

"How-?"

"Oh, Claude, before you leave I do need to talk to you about something. You're pretty resourceful when it comes to getting information. I want to ask you to look into something."

"Ha, You never cease to surprise, teach. Why not walk with me as we talk?" Claude sighed with a shake to his head. He glanced to Dimitri and instantly decided that he wanted to mess with the future king one more time before he left. He offered Byleth his arm, grinning when she placed her hand into the crook of his elbow, effectively causing Dimitri to glare at Claude. He remained silent, though, probably figuring out what Claude was trying to do. Claude gave a wave over his shoulder as he walked with the Professor. "Let's promise to meet again and when we do... Don't be too hard on me, Your Kingliness."


	14. Chapter 13

Hey, I swear that I didn't abandon this story!

Sorry this took so long to get out. I really meant for this to come out in December at the latest but then life punched me in the face. The holidays, family coming to visit, work, and my computer messed up. It shuts off if you even look at it the wrong way and the screen is messed up.

I managed a temporary work around so that I can finish this chapter and get it out to you guys but it will definitely slow down the chapter updates. I will try to get them out monthly but if I can't make it, please understand that it's because my computer decided to mess up on me.

I hope you all enjoy this long awaited chapter!

-DarkDevilsAdvocate

* * *

"Well, Dimitri? Are you finally going to tell us the damned truth?" Felix demanded as everyone cornered the prince in the hall. They had just returned to Garragh Mach earlier that day and was to take the rest of the day off. Instead, they decided to get some answers by luring and trapping Dimitri who stared at them in confusion and a little bit of apprehension. Did they find out about his relationship with Byleth? Had they been found out somehow when he had carried her into his room? Neither of them had really talked about whether to let others know or not. It had never really come up. It wasn't that it was an important matter that others needed to know, either. Dimitri decided to err on caution and neutrally ask for clarification.

"What are you talking about?"

"Didn't Lord Arundel say something about you and Edelgard being family?" Ashe asked, clearing up the conversation for Dimitri. Ingrid jumped in right after.

"To claim that the King and the Emperor are related... Could it be?"

"Ah, I suppose I never told you, though I have talked to the professor about it... Lord Arundel spoke the truth. My stepmother was Edelgard's birth mother. Political turmoil drove my stepmother out of the Empire. Father fell in love with her at first sight and they married. I lost my birth mother before I was old enough to remember her. My stepmother filled that role for me but she lost her life in Duscur nine years ago, along with father."

"Hang on. I didn't know she was your stepmother. Does my father know about this?"

"Yes. All those where close to my father knew, including Rodrigue. But to speak openly about it would have caused a scandal and so she was our secret. No one in the general public knew about her. Naturally, the fact that Edelgard and I are step-siblings was kept a secret as well." The pieces clicked into place for the others; explaining Dimitri's actions all these years. His constant rage and pain.

"I'm finally beginning to understand what you went through five years ago. I mean, Edelgard is the only family you have left, isn't she? To find out someone so precious to you is actually your most hated enemy... How heartbreaking." Mercedes murmured. Of all people, Mercedes was the one that understood his position the most with her own brother a part of the Empire; as the death knight no less.

"But wait! You two were born and raised in two different territories, right? So you probably never met until you were both at the academy. I mean, don't get me wrong, I think the idea of fighting family is just about the worst thing ever, but hopefully the fact that she's a stepsister who you never really knew helps with the pain... I don't know, it was just a thought"

"I'm afraid that's not the case. Though it was only for a short time, Edelgard once called Fhirdiad home. It was a long time ago, but she was a cherished friend of mine." Dimitri explained in response to Annette's desperate attempt to find the situation less tragic. He almost felt a little bad at how her expression fell at his words.

"Wait! I remember now! She was that girl, wasn't she? The one you gave a dagger to! Heh, so your little girlfriend was Edelgard." Sylvain smiled cheekily and if he was closer he would have nudged the prince with a wink while probably earning a well-deserved smack in return. Still, he had effectively cut through the tension that had been growing in the air.

"Sylvain, If you have any more foolish things to say, please hold them for later." Dimitri sighed heavily. He had adored Edelgard but never to the point that Sylvain seemed to think and kept teasing him about. He had always wanted to consider her family but knew when they had reunited that that would no longer be a possibility. She kept herself cold and indifferent from him.

Then he had found out she was the Flame Emperor.

"I do have a few more up my sleeve but they can wait. Go on, Your Highness. This is important for us to hear."

"She may be a hated enemy now, but the emperor is your old friend and your stepsister." Felix stepped in with a frown, leveling an even gaze on Dimitri as he asked his question. "Can you bring yourself to kill her?"

"I will kill her... if I must. But if there is any chance that the world she seeks to create could be a just one... Then I... I would love to see a future in which I may reach out my hand for her and have her reach back. That said, I have no intention of letting my personal feelings cloud my judgment. Too much is at stake."

"Your Highness... I think you should meet with the emperor and at least try to talk to her. If there's any hope of ending this war without more bloodshed, we have to try. Besides, killing your own family... I'm sorry, but it's not right." Ashe suggested and Dimitri had to agree. He found it odd that just a month ago he had been determined to kill Edelgard but now he was determined to take the chance to make peace between them.

"I... I think so too. And you are right. That we should at least try." He agreed, silence following his words until Sylvain gave a cheeky grin at his friend and Dimitri felt trepidation grow in the pit of his stomach.

"So, Edelgard isn't your girlfriend... but what about the professor?" Dimitri sighed heavily as Annette shouted 'oh yeah!' and all eyes focused on him for his answer. All but Felix who scoffed and walked away with a mumbled 'this is a waste of time'. Dimitri hesitated in his answer. He and Byleth had never really discussed revealing their relationship. It was still new between them, only a few months old, and though they both knew that the other students were aware that there was something going on between the prince and the professor, other matters were more important and needed the focus; the war being one of them.

"F-foolishness..." He mumbled as he took a step back then another. This was a conversation he didn't want to have, at least not alone, and he took a page from Byleth's book; he could hear their gasp of surprise behind him when he turned and ran.

* * *

Byleth stood before the dorm, ready to knock on it's sturdy, wooden door when she hesitated. It felt like perhaps it would be too little too late. It had been months since she had last interacted with Bernadetta and she didn't know just what she would say to the girl. She just felt that she had to say something or else everything she had done thus far to save the girl would end up for naught.

After steadying her nerves, Byleth knocked with an assertiveness that would have forced others to open by her sheer willpower alone.

That didn't work for Bernadetta.

Byleth heard a yelp followed by silence. She waited a moment as she listened attentively for the slightest of sounds in the dorm room. The silence was so thick that Byleth thought that the girl was holding her breath. She wondered if Bernadetta was truly that frightened of her old professor.

"I'd like to talk to you; if you'd give me your time." Byleth spoke aloud, hoping her voice carried clearly through the bulky door.

"P-professor?" Bernadetta called out, giving a soft 'meep' when Byleth gave an affirmative. "I'm so sorry! Please don't kill me!"

"Kill you? Why would I do that?" Byleth asked automatically in her confusion, composing herself of her surprise after the sudden yell from the timid girl who's previous word had been a mere mumble a moment before.

"You were hurt... b-because of me..."

Byleth opened her mouth only to shut it with a clack of teeth. She had been about to say something along the lines of 'it's fine' or 'it's not your fault' but stopped herself. Bernadetta had been fretting over this for the past few months and she deserved proper consideration in the answer she would receive.

Byleth thought carefully on what she would say, on how her words would impact the girl still standing on the other side of the door, taking a long while. She didn't know if it was only a couple minutes or if it had been an hour but-

"Bernadetta?"

"I'm here." Bernadetta murmured.

"You believe I was hurt because of you."

"Y-yes?"

"I can't say that you're wrong. I was indeed burned because we couldn't get off of the structure before it went up in flames." Byleth stated honestly, hearing the soft gasp that the younger woman gave but continued on before she could fall into self-reflective depression. "But that wouldn't be a reason to kill you. It kind of defeats the purpose of saving you in the first place."

"O-oh."

"And I have to say that it was very much my own fault that I was hurt. There were many things I could have done but didn't. I could have just left you and saved myself. I could have grabbed you and pulled you with me without trying to get your consent. I could have just tackled you and rolled ups both off that thing. I could have tried to find some way to stop the fire from starting in the first place. I could have used a pegasus or wyvern and just lifted us up where the fire couldn't have gotten us."

Byleth sighed and leaned against the door, her forehead pressed against the rough wood as she closed her eyes and mentally went over everything that had happened, everything she had experienced so far.

"Now that I think about it, there were so many other choices and options that would have been better." Byleth gave a hollow laugh at her own over-eagerness to save another that it had narrowed her line of vision away from other possibilities. "But you want to know something? I don't regret my choice any. Not at all. I don't think I would ever regret saving another person."

"Not even an enemy?" Bernadetta asked after a moment of hesitation.

"Not even an enemy. It's hard enough to get through life without regrets, I don't want to spend any of it regretting on not doing something I could have to save another person. I want to try and end this war as soon as possible for all the people like you that didn't have a choice in this. I want to bring peace back to everyone."

There was a long silence as Bernadetta thought over Byleth's words and the professor waited patiently for her. She was surprised by the gentle click of the door and was greeted to the sight of a single grey eye staring up at her with shimmering hopefulness.

"I-I would like to help."

* * *

"Are you OUT OF YOUR MIND?!" Catherine yelled. They had gathered for a meeting on how they would penetrate Fort Merceus when Byleth had brought up the fact that Bernadetta would be of help. Predictably, Dimitri and Rodrigue had considered her words but Catherine had argued against it.

She had pointed out the Bernadetta had been an enemy, might still be an enemy, and they were willing to hinge their plan on her? They didn't know if she had really changed sides. Byleth insisted that she had but Catherine wasn't having any of it. They had argued back and forth for the past few minutes, ignoring any attempts from others to mediate.

"People should be given the chance to-."

"Stab you in the back? You've given her plenty of opportunity." Catherine's hand motioned towards the girl cowering behind the professor. Bernadetta squeaked as the intimidating knight's attention fell on her. Byleth really didn't want to argue with Catherine. She had been one of Byleth's staunches supporters when she had become Archbishop and she was afraid that she would ruin any future friendship that had blossomed between them before. Still, Byleth couldn't let her just doubt Bernadetta's sincerity like that.

"She can be of help and she wants to! We should give her that chance!"

With an aggravated grunt, the knight looked towards the others, her eyes focusing on the calm Rodrigue and Seteth.

"Aren't you guys going to say anything? Talk some sense into her!"

"I believe she has a point." Rodrigue answered with an almost uncaring shrug. "It's not called an 'Impregnable Fortress' for no reason."

"Ha. I expected this from Dimitri, He's a love sick-puppy, but you? I thought you were more level-headed than that." Catherine sighed heavily, ignoring Dimitri's attempt to interject, and turned her attention to Seteth who had managed to stay out of the argument so far; gaining his attention and waving towards the professor in a silent bid for his help. Everyone knew that Seteth didn't hold back in his scolding if he thought someone was doing something to hurt the church. The older man looked between the knight and the professor, frowning after a moment.

"I understand where you are coming from, Lady Catherine, but we cannot simply dismiss the possibility of the girl's help. The Professor's plans have been helpful in the past. Her experience as a mercenary-."

"Does not make her an authority in war." Catherine hissed with a shake of her head. "I can't understand what Lady Rhea was thinking, leaving a young girl like her in charge. You put too much trust in the enemy. First that general, then his sister, and now this!"

Bernadetta flinched and pressed her forehead into Byleth's back as if she could escape from the press of everyone's eyes on her by melding with the solid stone that was her professor; the only protection standing between her and the scrutinizing gaze of everyone else. Byleth felt Bernadetta shaking like a leaf against her back and the thread of patience that Byleth had left snapped.

"That is ENOUGH." Byleth scowled. Her voice didn't raise into a yell but there was a sharp enough edge to her words that everyone fell silent and focused their attention on her, somehow finding it hard to meet her burning gaze. If authority was a weapon, Byleth would be wielding hers, pointed at the throats of the others until they bent to her will. "Just as you said, Lady Catherine, Lady Rhea left _me_ in charge of the church. Bernadetta will assist us in the next battle. After we take Fort Merceus we will march Enbarr. Am I understood?"

Byleth's gaze traveled over each person, reaching behind her and gently taking Bernadetta's hand when no one spoke up so she could lead the girl out of the room and the people that had been scaring her.

"Yes, well... I believe that brings this meeting to an end." Seteth coughed into the silence that had followed Byleth's departure. With a bit of awkwardness, everyone slowly filed out of the room.

* * *

Byleth paced the garden path as she worried her bottom lip with her teeth. She had managed to stay calm until she had escorted Bernadetta back to her room but then was suddenly hit with the realization that she had just put everyone that was technically higher in rank than her. She wasn't the Archbishop yet and though she had started to cultivate friendships with them before the five-year gap, they weren't the close friends that they had been before her journey back in time.

She hated that she and Catherine had argued but there was one that was more important and she didn't want to lose as a part of her life.

"Professor?" His voice called out and she looked up at Seteth, giving him a small smile as she approached him. "What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to speak with you, actually. I wanted to say how grateful I was for your support in there."

"As you said, Lady Rhea chose you to lead the church in her absence."

"Ah, true... But I wanted you to know how much your support means to me." Byleth emphasized and she watched as the surprised look on Seteth's face evened out and reddened.

"Oh... I was... I was under the impression that you and Dimitri..." Seteth began, confusing Byleth as he continued. "Not that I don't appreciate your attention but I'm not looking for- What's so funny?"

Byleth had tried not to laugh at the awkwardness of Seteth's attempt to let her down gently but the misunderstanding and the relief that he was still willing to talk to her had forced the giggle out.

"No, Seteth, no. I care about you but like _family_. You're like an uncle to me. Flayn is like a cousin." She told him with a smile, walking with him down the path towards the dining hall.

"Ah, My apologies for the misunderstanding but I wouldn't say we were close enough to be family."

"But aren't we? Technically? My mother was created by Rhea, after all." Byleth shrugged nonchalantly, pausing when she realized that Seteth had stopped in his tracks. He was staring at her oddly at her confession.

"You knew?"

"You told me."

"I did not. I believe I would remember such a conversation."

"Right, I guess I should have said you will tell me. Or I guess not, now, since I already have the knowledge but you did tell me." Byleth rambled, watching his confusion grow at her words. She couldn't blame him. trying to explain something without the context would confuse anyone. Byleth motioned for Seteth to follow her to a secluded spot, away from where they could be accidentally overheard, and then proceeded to tell him everything. He would be the third. The third to know everything about what she could do and what she had been through. Seteth listened in shocked silence and his breathing became a little ragged during her story.

"You could talk to her? To Sothis?" He asked in a soft voice; as if speaking any louder would cause this current reality to shatter all around him.

"Yes. She was a steadying force for me when everything was being upended around me." She confessed in a soothing voice. She had expected his reaction. It was the same one he had the last time she had told him, but then they had been a lot closer as well. Still, She understood that it must be hard to know that your sister had been somewhat successful when it came to returning your mother to life. It wasn't a chance that most people get. It made her wonder how she would react if she had the chance to see her father again.

"I see." Seteth closed his eyes and took a steadying breath. She waited patiently for him to come to terms with all the information she had just dumped on him. "Dimitri and Rodrigue knows all of this as well?"

"Yes."

"That explains why they have such faith in your decisions." Seteth sighed and looked to Byleth, studying her face in silence before speaking again. "So you see me as an uncle?"

"Yes, and Flayn is like a cousin." Byleth nodded with a smile, glad that the conversation had turned towards something lighter in tone.

"And what about Lady Rhea?"

Byleth paused and thought about it. Rhea certainly had a motherly feel to her but it wasn't 'mother' that Byleth felt when she thought of Rhea. No, if anything she was more like a...

"Grandmother?" Seteth's laugh caught Byleth off-guard, causing her to jump at its sudden sound.

"She's old enough." Seteth said. Byleth blinked and then joined him in laughing. "Don't tell her I said that."

It was nice to be able to just have a moment of levity with her family again.


	15. Chapter 14

Flayn was the next one to be brought into the fold of those who knew of Byleth's powers. The girl was surprised but took it all in stride; happily welcoming the professor as another member of her family. They had always been on amicable terms but now Flayn happily treated Byleth like the family that she technically was. Byleth had been spending her afternoons with the two of them creating familial bonds.

Byleth was glad to have her family back again. When she had lost her father she hadn't been sure she would ever have someone she could depend on like that again. That had changed when Rhea and Seteth had sat down with her and explained her history, how she was the daughter of Rhea's creation who had fallen in love with Jeralt, and suddenly she had family again. Family that were willing to _be_ family. Byleth was happy to be able to spend time with Seteth and Flayn again outside of school or war planning, just talking about inane things.

Though Seteth and Flayn occupied Beleth's days, Dimitri always had her nights.

"We'll be leaving tomorrow." Dimitri murmured into the darkness as he ran his hand up and down Byleth's back. It was a habit he had gained as if he was using the motion to sooth himself, like he was reminding himself that she was there, that this was real, instead of some blissful dream that he could wake from at any moment and find himself alone in the darkness again; waiting for his inevitable death.

Byleth didn't mind the action; though she had quickly realized that it was something that had differed between _this_ Dimitri and _her_ Dimitri. No, that wasn't right. They were both _her_ Dimitri now. She would have to find some other way to designate the Dimitri she was currently in bed with and the one that she had left behind.

Still, she figured that it was something he had gained by starting their relationship so much sooner than they had last time she had lived through this. Another change to the myriad that was slowly piling up. The basic timeline was the same but the people around her and the relationships she had with them were completely different. She sometimes wondered just what the future would look like now.

Byleth shifted so she could look at Dimitri's outline in the darkness. Even when she couldn't make out his features clearly, she liked looking at him. He looked so relaxed as they laid in bed, having worked out their energy and stress through other productive measures. Certainly more enjoyable.

"Bernadetta should have arrived at Fort Merceus soon." Byleth agreed, frowning lightly. The plan that everyone had finally agreed on was that Bernadetta and a few others dressed up as peasants would go to Fort Merceus, claiming to be escaped prisoners of war from Garragh Mach. Bernadetta had enough going for her that she should be able to convince the people at the fort that she had been brought back to the monastery and locked away. She would tell them that she had posed so little a threat that they had stopped locking her door and she had escaped. She was also to tell them that she had information about other captured Prisoners; A captured general and his sister. Byleth had opposed to it for a while, mostly in fear of putting Bernadetta in danger, but eventually caved since it was a best option presented to them.

The Kingdom Army would march on the Fort and trust that Bernadetta would leave a way in for them. It was better than a long siege to an impregnable fortress. Rodrigue and Dimitri had asked Byleth how she had taken the fort last time and she could only tell them 'with time and a _lot_ of force'. It had been a long and tiring battle, constantly under attack as they whittled down their way inside. That was when the _real_ battle started.

Risking Bernadetta wasn't something that Byleth wanted to do but it was better than what they had had to resort to last time. Bernadetta's severe case of low self-esteem, her fear and paranoia, her compulsion to run and hide made it easily believable that she was left in her dorm with the door carelessly unlocked. It also would help her keep a low profile after she got access to the fort until it was time for her to open the gates for the Kingdom Army. Byleth also knew it would take a special kind of courage to risk one's life to open the gate and she was confident that Bernadetta had that courage within her.

"I'm worried about the Death Knight." Dimitri spoke into the darkness with a heavy sigh. Byleth had made them aware that the fort would be guarded by the Death Knight before the reports had come in about it and it concerned everyone; especially when they saw how wary Byleth was about the upcoming battle. They had faith that they would win the war since she had experienced it all before but her anxiety was easily spread to the others.

"I hope Bernadetta will be alright in his presence."

"Say, Byleth... In the past, it seemed like the Death Knight took some strange satisfaction from his fights with you. He's an unpredictable opponent. A dangerous one." Dimitri's hold on her tightened, pulling her up until there was only a breath of space between them. He could see her shining green eyes vividly in the darkness. "You might become his main objective. Please, proceed with caution."

"Will you save me if I get in trouble?" Byleth asked in a half-teasing voice, taken off-guard by the kiss he gave her; deep and passionate, just like his voice as he answered her.

"Of course. You were the heart of the Blue Lions, the same holds true for the Kingdom army, and-." He held her hands flat against his chest, over his beating heart. "you are _my_ heart."

"It feels like it beats for the both of us." Byleth whispered in reverent awe. She knew that they had to sleep, that they had a big day tomorrow, but his words lit a fire in her and she leaned up enough to capture his lips.

A few more hours without sleep wouldn't make _that_ much of a difference, right?

* * *

Despite her misgivings about the plan to have Bernadetta infiltrate the Fort it went smoothly; allowing the army to march right in. That was when the real battle started. Even though the walls had been a major obstacle it wasn't the only one.

They fought their way through the forces that held the fort. Any that surrendered were shown mercy but none did. Perhaps their fear of the Death Knight was greater than the death that the Kingdom Army brought.

Byleth didn't blame them any for that. Years had dulled the memory and fear but standing before the imposing figure on horseback brought it all back. It was like a cold air that bore through her clothes, her skin, and right to her bone; spreading like ice in her blood. She _knew_ who he was, what he was capable of, and that they could defeat him but that didn't stop the black dread that spread through her when those glowing red eyes focused on her.

_I have to try_.

"Jeritza, this is enough. Please. Mercedes misses you." Byleth pleaded. She didn't know if there was a way to save the man that had once been Mercy's brother but Byleth had to take the chance. She wanted to save everyone she could.

"**Jeritza is no more**." The deep and gravely voice of the Death Knight ground out. It was his only answer as he lifted his weapon to strike at the professor. She readied herself for the blow, determined to weather it so she could get another attempt, but all thought, all plans, left when someone else stepped in the way.

At first it was just a thin line across his armor, shoulder to shoulder, then crimson began to flow and he stumbled backwards, held to his feet only by Byleth's arms taking his weight. She heard everyone shout in worry around them but she couldn't focus on any of that. Another type of fear, greater than that for the Death Knight, gripped her heart.

_No... No this isn't... This couldn't..._

"I'm alright." Dimitri spoke as he got back to his feet, attempting to step forward to get back into the fight but was held in place by someone gripping his cloak. He turned to see Byleth holding on to him in a white-knuckled grip. Her face was oddly blank as her eyes stared unfocused. "Byleth?"

She didn't respond. She didn't move. If he couldn't hear her ragged breathing he would have thought her a solid statue with how stone still she was. Her eyes slid closed when his fingers brushed against her cheek.

"I'm alright." He repeated, moving closer to her as he whispered reassurances. His armor had taken the brunt of the damage and though he was hurting he was by no means dead. She didn't react and Dimitri was worried that if she didn't snap out of it she would be in greater danger. The Death Knight was currently distracted by the others but it was only a matter of time before he turned his attention back to his favored opponent.

Dimitri was startled when her eyes snapped open, staring passed him at the Death Knight with a focus both sharp and steely.

"Mercedes. I'm sorry." Byleth apologized, brushed Dimitri off as she stepped around him, and swung with a yell. They had been struggling against this beast of an enemy, one that even Dimitri at his worst would have a hard time against, and Byleth cut him down in a single swing.

The Death Knight fell to the ground with a heavy clatter. His horse reared up and sped away, through the stunned soldiers and students that watched as the Professor stood over the Death Knight; her face as blank as they had ever seen it. It was as if all the emotion she had gained, that she had shown over the passed few months had fled.

"**This... is suitable...**" The Death Knight said with a satisfied tone. Mercedes was the first to break out of the trance that Byleth's still aura had placed them all in, rushing to her brother's side and peeling his helmet off. Byleth, instead of encroaching on the last few moments that the siblings would have, turned and strode away.

"Byleth! Byleth, wait!" Dimitri called to her as he followed her, a hand to his chest as if it could hold back the pain. They had essentially taken the fort. They should be celebrating.

So why did he have the feeling that she was angry?

"Byleth, Wait!" He grabbed her hand and turned her to face him, startled by the glare she leved at him.

"You can't keep _DOING_ that!" She shouted as she pulled from him roughly. "Do you not understand the position that you're in?! Do you not realize who you ARE?!"

"Wha-."

"The Alliance has been disbanded and absorbed by the Kingdom; If you die the Empire wins! If by some miracle the Kingdom continues and wins the war, that means Fodlan would be without a leader! _I_ am not worth that!"

"You expect me to just allow you to be hurt, to possibly be killed?" Dimitri snapped back, her anger infectious. "Even though you could not claim the same?"

"YOU are the only ruling body! Even if I ignored my feelings I still could not allow you to die!"

"Neither can I! Unlike you, some of us don't get second chances!"

The silence that came after his words was all encompassing; like a thick blanket had been thrown over everyone, smothering all sound. The soldiers quickly found other things to do; searching the dead for any survivors, cataloging the supplies, setting up base in the fort. Anything to keep them away from the frozen atmosphere that surrounded the two that currently led the whole army.

Dimitri had realized his words were too much as soon as they had left his lips but it was too late to take them back. They had already been thrown out into the world to do their damage.

"Byleth, I'm sorry. I didn't-."

"Why are you apologizing? Your words were true." Byleth sighed. Her powers came with a weight that no one else would ever know. They would never know what it was like to see Felix's smashed in with a hammer; half his face caved in, an eye popped out from the pressure of the hit. They would never know what it was like to watch blood slip from Ashe's lips as he tried to speak passed the arrow in his throat, fear in his eyes when he realized he was going to die. They would never know what it was like to hear the death whinny of a Pegasus or the heavy splat or the crack of bones breaking as Ingrid fell from the air. These would never share the experience of having seen someone burn alive, their skin blackening as their eyes burst and run freely like tears as their screams became hoarse from the smoke before falling silent forever.

Those were memories that she would have to carry for the rest of her life that they would never know.

She had never considered how it would be for the others should they have to watch another die. She seen horrible deaths but she had been able to reverse time and ultimately save them. The others didn't have that ability. If she died... She would be dead and they all would have to live with that. There would be no chance to reverse it and save her. There would be left with the stain of whatever terrible death she experienced for the rest of their life.

Why had she never considered that before? It was a massive oversight on her part.

Still, Dimitri couldn't be risking his life for her, especially now during the war. He had to survive until the end of the war. He couldn't put herself before him. He was the future _king_. He hadn't done such things the last time she had lived through the war and she wondered if perhaps it was because they weren't in a relationship then. Had this all been a mistake?

"Byleth...?" Dimitri called out, reaching out for her only to pause when she took a step back, out of his range.

"I need some time. To think." She murmured softly, letting her eyes fall so she couldn't see Dimitri's expression as she turned and walked away from him.

Dimitri was unable to say anything as he watched Byleth get further and further away. Why did those words worry him so much?


	16. Chapter 15

Due to unforeseen circumstances this will be my last chapter. The story ends here.

...

That is not true, it's an April Fools joke. A really bad one. I have no intention of abandoning this story.

Anyway, I hope everyone's staying safe and please enjoy the chapter.

-DarkDevilsAdvocate

* * *

A messenger arrived from Margrave Gautier, Sylvain's father, with two pieces of news; one good and one bad. The good was that Fhaergus was finally united, the other lords cowed into falling in line and supporting Dimitri's war effort. The bad was that one of Viscount Klieman's men confessed to being a part of the Duscar Tragedy and that the Viscount had also been a part of it. The man, along with the troops and supplies, were currently headed towards the monastery.

The thing was Dimitri wanted Byleth to come with him but he didn't know how to ask after their last conversation.

_It wouldn't be weird to just ask... right?_ Dimitri thought as he wandered through the fort in search of the professor. He found her walking the ramparts, looking out at he fields that stretched out in every direction from the fort. He took a moment to marvel at how beautiful she was bathed in the glow of the setting sun.

_I need some time to think._

Dimitri frowned when his brain unhelpfully reminded him of her words. How was he supposed to ask her to come with him after that? He wasn't even sure that she wanted him around until she had come to whatever conclusion that came after her serious considerations. It was frustrating.

"Byleth." Dimitri forced himself to call out to her only to frown at the strangely blank expression on her face reminiscent of when she had first arrived to Garragh Mach all those years ago. He had grown so used to the emotion she readily displayed lately, the fact that she wore her heart on her sleeve, that such an empty look was startling. It also had the added benefit of hiding her thoughts perfectly.

Frustrating.

It had been so much easier when he had been swallowed by anger, surrounding himself in his own melancholy and allowing himself to be used as a tool for vengeance. He didn't have to worry about others. He didn't have to think about consequences. He didn't have to be bothered about the future. He had been living as a corpse driven by revenge. He hadn't needed to consider the future at all when he had been willing to die as long as it meant that he killed that woman. It had all been to uselessly appease his ghosts.

"A messenger has come. there's new about Duscar." Dimitri growled in a way that was re-mindful of his aggressive and feral state, causing Byleth's eyes to widen. He was a little happy to see that he could cause her to react, to make an expression other than her blank but also felt a little guilty by it as well. What could she think other than the fact that he was reverting to how he was when she had found him? Despite that, though, he didn't pull back from the hostile tone in his voice. "I will return to the monastery. I want you to join me."

He hadn't stated it as a question but Byleth nodded in answer anyway. They stared at each other with Dimitri breaking the silence when it started to grow awkward.

"Right. Good." He resisted the urge to cough just to add more noise between them and turned with a bit of a dramatic flair with his cloak. He stormed away with an aura of menace that instantly faded once he had turned the corner and was out of her sight only to be replaced by utter embarrassment.

_Why did I do that?! She probably thinks I'm regressing to my predatory feral state! What if... what if I succeeded in pushing her further away?_

Dimitri sighed and ran both of his hands over his face with an aggravated groan.

_I'm an idiot._

* * *

The soldiers were lively as they marched through the fields and the forests; laughing and joking. There was two circles of silence in a perfect diameter around Byleth and Dimitri, who traveled in different sections of the parade of troops. After their argument the previous day, and with the speed of spreading rumors, everyone in the army was convinced of the relationship between them. The soldiers that were outside of the areas of silence were making bets, first initiated by a certain red-head, on whether or not the two leaders would get back together and, if so, who would be the first to cave and apologize. So far it was 3 to 1 with Dimitri the losing side.

Dimitri hadn't come to any conclusion in his worried thoughts by the time they had stopped to camp for the night and he decided that he would take his mind off of his concerns he decided that he would help out with setting things up. He first offered his help to putting the tents together but after breaking three poles, two stakes, and a mallet in his distracted state, it was suggested that he find others in need of help. He found his way to food preparation but with his lack of taste the food ended up over-seasoned, under-seasoned, or burnt. He was chased away after that. Word must have spread quickly, because everyone else quickly, but politely, refused his offers of help.

With nothing to occupy him, his thoughts came back to plague his mind.

_I need some time to think. I need some time to think. I need some time to think. I need some time to think. I need some time to think. I need some time to think. I need some time to think._

Over and over those words echoed in his head. The night air cooled his skin as he paced through the camp while Byleth's words repeated consistently; more insistent than the accusing dead that tormented him. She hadn't been _avoiding_ him exactly but she hadn't sought him out and he had been so distraught by what she had said that he hadn't been able to approach her since asking her to come with him back to Garragh Mach. Whenever his eye was drawn towards her those words would repeat.

_I need some time to think._

What was there to even think about and for this long? Shouldn't it be simple?

_I need some time to think._

Her words were louder and more persistent than any of the vengeful dead that plagued him. Their voices were mere whispers compared to the strength behind Byleth's declaration that repeated over and over again. Consistent. Reverberating. Tormenting.

_I need some time to think._

"Hey, Board Prince." Felix called out, breaking the future king out of his thoughts. He had seen how distracted Dimitri had become and had decided that he would help... in his own way. "Spar with me."

Dimitri looked up Felix who stared at him with a flat look as he waited for the prince to make up his mind. After a moment, Dimitri turned to face his old friend fully.

"Lets."

* * *

No one really wanted to fight, even a false one, after the battle at the fort and the daylong march so there hadn't been an official training area set up in camp. Dimitri and Felix made due with a wide empty area at the edge of camp. Far enough that the camp wasn't in any danger but close enough that they had light from the campfires to see by.

The battle started slowly with the two of them circling each other. Dimitri was the first to make a move, stabbing forward with the training spear he had picked up for the fight. Dimitri outclassed Felix with strength and it would only take one or two hits for him to win. That was _if_ he could hit. Felix easily dodged the attack and sliced up at Dimitri who only just managed to block. Dimitri may have the strength but Felix had the dexterity to dodge and attack right after.

Back and forth they exchanged blows, evenly matched, as they ignored the soldiers and knights that looked their way, watching and making bets on who would be the winner.

Dimitri growled as he stabbed forward again and sliced sideways when Felix lept to the side, the swordsman bringing his sword up to take the brunt of the attack. Dimitri was pressing his advantage, the corner of his mouth lifting as the swordsman's feet began to slide along the grass at Dimitri leaned into his attack. With a grunt Felix angled his blade and caused Dimitri's spear to dig into the ground. Dirt exploded around them as the prince lifted his weapon quickly when his old friend attempted to counter.

It wasn't fast enough.

"Sloppy." Felix scolded with a scowl as he pulled his blade back to his side after having smacked Dimitri across the shoulders. There was a noticeable sting as Dimitri stood up and he scowled up at the sky at his own failure. "You're distracted."

"'_I need time to think_'. What does that mean?"

"Is that what she said?" A third voice asked and both of them looked towards Sylvain as he walked up to them with a careless wave of his hand. "That's never a good thing."

"What do you mean?" Dimitri asked with a slightly desperate note to his voice.

"Well, usually when a girl says that it means that she's considering breaking up." Sylvain as he gave his friend a sad look and a shake of his head. He really did feel bad for the Prince's first real breakup.

"W-what?"

"He _means_ that she's finally come to her senses and realized that she's better off without you." Felix added with a glare that was ignored. Dimitri was too distraught to hear what they said. There was no way, right? Byleth _loved_ him. She had said so. She had married him in another timeline. She wouldn't give all that up, would she? She wanted to still be with him right?

Sylvain had to be mistaken. Had to be... but if anyone had expertise of breaking up, it was Sylvain. How many times had Dimitri witnessed women breaking up with Sylvain? How many more had there been that he hadn't seen? If anyone knew that hose words were the end of a relationship, it was Sylvain.

Could it be true? Was Byleth truely going to separate herself from him? Was there anything he could do to convince her otherwise?

No, he shouldn't be so selfish. If she truly decided that she would be happier without him...

If she would be happier...

* * *

Byleth sat before one of the fires that had been set up throughout the camp to keep everyone warm in the cool of the night and to light up the darkness. Being further south, it was warmer than it would have been had they been in Garragh Mach but the nights were still chilly. None of that really mattered to Byleth at the moment. Even the war was far from her mind. Instead she was focused on what had happened between her and Dimitri. She was so frustrated with the fact that Dimitri kept throwing himself in harms' way to save her, he _knew_ what it did to her, and yet he never seemed to think about it. She knew that he acted more on instinct than thought when he moved to defend her and she knew she should take that into account but ever since her emotions had become more pronounced she had a hard time setting them aside to think about other's motivations clearly. She didn't have the practice that others did at controlling her emotions.

"May I have this seat?" Byleth looked up to see Seteth standing nearby, waving to the empty spot next to her. She gave a nod and scooted an inch in silent invitation. She said nothing as stared into the fire while Seteth gave a soft groan like the old man he was as he lowered himself into a seated position. They sat there in silence long enough for Byleth to wonder if Seteth was waiting for her to speak. Just as she was about to give in, Seteth spoke first.

"It wasn't exactly subtle." He began, nodding to the other side of the camp where a space had been left on the edge of camp and was currently taken by Felix and Dimitri as they fought each other in a spar that was friendly for them. Anyone who watched could see that Dimitri was throwing himself into the faux battle. He had the superiority in strength but Felix was dexterous enough to dodge almost every blow. It was a battle of brawn over finesse. "What are your plans?"

"I don't know..." Byleth answered softly. She really didn't. Her thoughts had hovered over the fact that perhaps... perhaps this had all been a mistake. Her husband Dimitri hadn't thrown himself in danger to save her until that night where he had died and she had to wonder if it was because they hadn't had an official relationship until he had proposed to her at the Goddess tower. By then the war had been over and there hadn't been any more battles to fight. So was it her fault? Was it because she couldn't keep her secret to herself? Was it because she couldn't carry the burden of knowledge alone? Was it because her desire to be loved overwhelmed her good sense?

"Well, what do you _want_?"

"I... I want..." What? What did she want? She _wanted_ to be with Dimitri. She still loved him. Still wanted to be his lover, his wife, his beloved. She _also_ wanted him to take better care of himself instead of throwing himself into danger every time there was a chance. "I still want to be with him... But I want him to _stop_. stop trying to _protect_ me every time he _thinks_ I'm in danger. I want him to be _safe_."

"No one can stay safe. Not in war." Seteth reminded her and she frowned at the truth he spoke. Just because he was right didn't mean he had to point it out to her.

"Funny hearing that from the person who called a medic when Flayn tripped." Byleth replied a bit more bitterly than she had intended. "You asked me what I wanted, not what was feasible."

"True. Now, the question is have you actually _talked_ to him about what it was you wanted?" Seteth asked and silence was his answer. He gave her a knowing smile at the obviousness of her quiet pout. "I believe a talk is in order, then."

"Talking doesn't always work."

"You won't know until you try. Sir Catherine was correct in one thing: Dimitri is a love-struck puppy. He will wag his tail happily for your smile."

Seteth's words startled a laugh out of her and Byleth raised a brow as she looked at the man she considered her uncle, her eyes glowing in the firelight

"You really think it's that easy?" She grinned at him when he gave her an even look that repeated his words as loudly as if he had said them out loud. _You won't know until you try._

"Seteth... Thank you." She spoke softly, blinking in some surprise as Seteth stared at her with an odd expression on his face. She was about to ask him about it but he spoke first.

"Byleth-."

"Byleth." A third voice interrupted them and brought both their attentions to Dimitri who stood before them; his appearance shrouded in shadow with his face cast in darkness from the campfire behind him.

"May we speak?"


	17. Chapter 16

So I had this conversation all planned out... and the Byleth didn't want to follow the script. And when Byleth went off script, of course, Dimitri happily followed so nothing I had thought up fit well. So, finally, here's the big talk and it feels a little anti-climactic to me but... well, whatever.

Sorry it took a month to get out and as always, enjoy.

-DarkDevilsAdvocate.

* * *

"May we speak?"

There was a moment of silence as both of the men waited for Byleth's response, Dimitri letting out the breath he hadn't realized he had been holding when she nodded.

"If you'll excuse me. I think it's about time I put your advice into practice." Byleth gave an uneasy smile to Seteth who waved her off; motioning for her to go ahead with Dimitri.

With Seteth's blessings, Byleth stood and followed Dimitri back towards the empty area that he and Felix had been using earlier to spar while trying to ignore the curious gazes of every eye that followed them. Dimitri was also aware of everyone's attention as he led her further away from the edge of camp than was strictly necessary so that there was little chance of them being overheard on accident.

They stood in silence at the forest's edge as Byleth waited for Dimitri to gather his thoughts and start the conversation. He had been the first to approach her for this conversation so she felt that it was only respectful to let him begin when he was ready.

"Byleth..." His voice wasn't more than a murmur but enough to gain her attention. Dimitri had turned to look at her with a serious expression and she felt herself begin to shake as she resisted her fight or flight instincts that kicked in. It was a weird sensation to feel when she had faced him at his worse and had never felt the adrenaline rush she had now. Was it the situation she was currently in? Did she want to run from whatever had him looking so serious? Or was it something else that was pushing her? Something she couldn't name?

Dimitri must have noticed the slight shake to her hands, despite her gripping them together to hide the effect, and increased the distance between them by a step. It helped a little but only because She was distracted by how thoughtful his actions were. It was as if whatever had flooded her with adrenaline had realized that he was no threat to her.

"I know you said that you wanted time to think but I believe that this is important." He began in a carefully neutral voice. He may not have wanted to scare her, to drive her away, but his attitude that was borderline cold worried her all the same. She was surprised when he suddenly closed the distance between them in a single stride to grab her shoulders. "I will support you."

"Wha-?"

"I would rather _not _us separate but if that is what you truly wish for then I will step aside. I just want you to be happy. Even if you do finally decide that being with me will not bring you to that happiness, I hope we can at least still be comrades and, possibly, friends."

"Dimit-." Byleth began but he didn't hear her words as he continued his quickly created speech, releasing her to pace in order to keep his mind on what he needed to say without faltering.

"I must be honest, though, that I cannot say I will be completely without hurt or envy for the next man you choose to share your life with; but I will endeavor not to allow my feelings get in the way of our friendship. You are my Beloved and I only wish the best for you even if it is not with me. I just- I- W-why are you crying?!" Dimitri nearly shouted, coming to a sudden stop when he glanced towards Byleth to gauge her reaction. Silent tears were not what he had been expecting. Tears weren't what Byleth expected either. He quickly closed the distance between them, reaching out for her, but his hands just hovered in the air between them as he hesitated, afraid that he would only make it worse.

"You're so stupid..." Byleth said as she wiped at her face; including herself as well as Dimitri in that statement. Even if he asked, she had no answer to give him because she had no idea _why_ she was crying. Her eyes had suddenly burned and the tears had come before she could stop them. It was a miserable thought that her husband had only seen her cry once, maybe twice, in the several years they had been married and now this Dimitri had seen her cry at least 4 times in less than one. "Why would you think I wanted to separate from you?"

"W-well Sylvain said that... that when a woman says that she needs time to think, she's reevaluating the relationship... Thinking about leaving... Was I wrong?"

"Maybe if it had been anyone else but I really _did _only need to think." Byleth answered with a shake of her head as she wiped at her face, trying desperately to stop her tears.

"I... I see..." Dimitri said even though he really didn't. He was still unsure what she had to think about so much that it wold take all day if it hadn't been her seriously considering leaving him. He stood there as he waited for Bylth to calm down so she could speak without gasps or sobs breaking up her words. It was a bit uncomfortable mostly because he could feel the stares of the people from the camp and he could imagine the whispers that were spreading as they watched Byleth sob before him. "Is there anything I can do?"

"Yeah, you can stop throwing yourself into the way of danger!" Byleth snapped with a frown, sighing when her sudden spike of anger managed to dry away her tears more effectively than her previous attempts had. "I _love_ you Dimitri. I don't want to be separated from you. I just don't want you to take any blows for me. If something happened to you... Even if I _can_ fix it... If something happened to you, I don't think I could stand it. I... I don't know what I would do."

"So I should just allow you to be harmed?" Dimitri asked a little bitterly. She was asking a lot from him. This felt like the same argument that they had had the day before with nothing new to add. "What you ask for is unfair. Do you realize how I _felt _when you were burned at Gondor Field? When we weren't sure that you would survive your injuries? We weren't lovers then and I _still _felt the potential loss keenly. I _cannot_ promise that I won't try to protect you."

Byleth frowned at Dimitri's stubbornness but didn't say anything as he grabbed her shoulders again.

"I know how skillful you are and I know that you will not go down easily but that does not mean that I cannot try and keep you from harm if given the chance. If you dislike it so much then you can either keep yourself _out_ of danger or..." Dimitri gave her a small smile to the glare she leveled at his suggestion. "You can protect me."

Any irritation that Byleth had felt slipped away at the cheeky grin he gave her with his proposition. It was unexpected and she laughed at the silliness of it but it was probably the best they were going to get. The war would be over soon and if he was going to throw himself into danger, then she would just have to throw herself into protecting him.

"That's probably the silliest thing I have ever heard." She told him with a small laugh, leaning her forehead against his chest. Taking this as acceptance to his words, Dimitri wrapped his arms around her and held her tight.

"Thank the goddess..." He whispered, kissing Byleth when she looked up at him, having not quite heard what he had said. He would have laughed at her blush but instead he opted to glare at the soldiers that cheered, jeered, and wolfwhistled the kiss. His dark look was enough to send them all back to whatever they were doing before their curiosity got the better of them. Byleth, for her part, pressed herself against Dimitri and hiding herself in his cloak; embarrassed by the soldier's reactions.

"Well... If they didn't know before..." Byleth said in a joking tone, even as her voice was muffled by her face pressed against his armor. "It's pretty obvious that they know now."

* * *

Everyone was glad when they had returned to the monastery and the comforts it provided: warm baths, good food, comfortable beds.

it was in the dining hall in which Gilbert found Byleth. From the number of empty plates that surrounded her, her appetite was as hardy as ever.

"Is he ready?" Byleth asked while the knight was distracted by the sheer amount of food that the professor always managed to put away.

"Ah, yes. He asked that you join him."

"Then I'll head over now." Byleth replied as she stood and reached for the many plates spread around her seat, stopping when Gilbert held out his hand to pause her.

"I'll help. He wanted us both there."

"Thank you." Byleth smiled while Gilbert looked at the mass of empty plates and wondered just _where_ she put it all.

* * *

"I cannot overlook your reckless remarks. Are you really so keen to lose your head?" Byleth walked into Dimitri's angry words. He spared her a glance when she stepped up next to him, Rodrigue on his other side where Gilbert took his spot.

"I only did what I believed was right. I swear to the goddess that I'm not lying. Amidst the Tragedy, Lady Patricia was supposed to be the only one who was unharmed. We had been given orders ahead of time not to approach her carriage..."

"Was Patricia an accomplice?" Byleth asked. This was one of the rare moments that she didn't remember. Perhaps it was because it was an odd conversation that didn't have much impact on the end of the war or any of the reformations that happened afterward. She didn't know why, but her mind had pushed this conversation completely out of her head.

"Of course not. What would my stepmother have had to gain from such a -."

"Perhaps Lady Patricia would have done anything to return to the Empire... to her husband and daughter." Gilbert interrupted and Dimitri scowled at what was being hinted at.

"For the past few months, I've been spying on lords who defected to the Empires in order to investigate rumors about Lady Patricia." Gilbert gave Dimitri an apologetic look. "Cornelia's words were true. The two of them... I am afraid they conspired together, after all."

"Enough of this nonsense. You say she wished to return home? That isn't nearly enough reason to cause such a tragedy." Dimitri scowled, the familiar growl from those first few months returning, causing both Gilbert and Rodrigue to flinch at its sound. Gilbert straightened, trying to hide his reaction that had been obvious because it had been mirrored by Rodrigue, tried to explain.

"I do not intent to imply that the two of them were solely responsible for the whole affair. There were likely nobles who apposed the king, or potentially someone who wanted to throw the Kingdom into chaos. The Empire, and people like Solon and Kronya, had their motives, too."

"So, my stepmother joined with them to cause the tragedy... Is that what you believe?"

"Ultimately, this is just conjecture based on the evidence at hand. I have no idea what their true intentions were." Gilbert answered as he held his hands out, palms up, in an attempt to pacify his angry king.

"I see. We will hear what this man has to say. For now..."

"My lord had long felt that King Lambert's radical ways were dangerous." The prisoner started with little prompting. "At the time, he was approached with an offer to take part in the incident at Duscur... My lord loves his homeland. To me, he embodied justice. We were only doing what we thought was right."

"And so, In the name of justice, he caused massacre upon massacre out of love for his homeland. You murdered your own king, killed our soldiers, and involved innocent citizens. And yet you have the gall to speak of justice?"

"I am only standing before you now because I could no longer bear the weight of my sins." The prisoner confessed while maintaining eye contact with Dimitri's cold glare.

"Do you regret your actions?" Byleth asked as she took a subtle step closer to Dimitri for two reasons: the first being to give Dimitri support in response to the obvious unease that Rodrigue and Gilbert showed. The second was so she could easily step in if Dimitri decided to attack though she doubted he would. She had no memory of him doing so before but there was always the chance that her choices could change something. Rodrigue standing on his other side was proof of that.

"No. I accept your hatred, and even the punishment of death, but I still believe it was a massacre in the name of justice."

"Gilbert. Lock this man in his cell." Dimitri scowled and Byleth reached out to take his hand, coaxing him to open his fist so she could thread her fingers with his, and ignoring the pain his grip gave. He needed this.

"Are you not... going to kill him?" Gilbert hesitated in case the prince suddenly changed his mind and suddenly lashed out.

"I will make that decision once I have had time to consider this man's definition of justice."

"Yes, Your Highness." Gilbert gave a slight bow and lifted the prisoner from his kneeling position and led him out of the room. Silence blanketed the room after his departure. Rodrigue looked as if he wanted to say something but was unsure if he should with Dimitri glaring at the spot the prisoner had occupied. After a moment he released Byleth's hand and strode out of the room.

"I had... suspicions..." Rodrigue sighed heavily, breaking the silence that surrounded them. "But never anything as concrete as a confession. That Patricia, Dimitri's step-mother, had a hand in the tragedy. Conjecture was all I had. Perhaps having him interact with the prisoner was a mistake."

"Why?"

"Could you imagine what it would be like to find out that the woman you thought as a mother, the only mother you have ever known, was a part of a plan that resulted in the death of your father, guards, and so many innocent people? A whole country destroyed by one woman." Rodrigue said as he faced her, giving her an appealing expression. "Please. Keep an eye on him. I have a fear that this may cause him to backslide."

* * *

It was dark when she found him in front of the alter. Byleth had waited on purpose to give him time to calm down and so that their conversation wouldn't be interrupted or overheard as everyone else would be heading to their beds.

"Are you OK?" Byleth asked though she knew the answer.

"No... I can't say that I am." Dimitri replied softly, turning to face her as he asked his question. "Tell me, Professor... How well do you remember your father, Jeralt?"

She remembered this question. She remembered her previous answer. She had told him that yes, she remembered her father well. She remembered the smell of steel and oil as he patiently taught her how to wield a sword. How he would laugh whenever she replied with a deadpan remark to something another mercenary said. How he would ruffle her hair or how he used to pick her up so she could ride his shoulder when she was still a child.

Now... now the answer was different. She had so many more years to fade her memories. She couldn't remember the color of his eyes. She remembered his laugh but not the sound of his voice. She forgot everyday interactions. Banal conversations. Easy-going days... they were all fading away.

"Not very well."

"I figured as much. Even the memory of those who pass away is taken from those they left behind. Little by little. Year by year." Dimitri sighed and closed his eye. "To be honest, I cannot really remember my stepmother's... that woman's smile. Nor the sound of her voice. I always told myself that I would not allow my mind to forget. And yet... all I can recall with clarity is her gazing away, so forlorn. Did my stepmother wish to go home so badly that she would kill Father and me... kill her false family?"

Dimitri's expression took on a contemplative look.

"Home... to her own blood. Her true family."

"I don't have those answers." Byleth answered his unspoken question. She could see that he was wondering if his step-mother never thought of him and his father as part of her family. She stepped closer and he willingly welcomed her into his arms, resting his cheek on the top of her head as he sighed again.

"I suppose it doesn't make any difference now. I am asking you questions you could not possibly know the answer to. I am _finished_ with thoughts like that. I am finally able to go on living without clinging to hate. If I truly treasure those who have died, then I must earnestly atone for my sins."

Byleth gave him a little squeeze in silent support and she felt him shift so he could place a light kiss to her hair in thanks, his voice slightly muffled.

"Father, Glenn, all if the soldiers who have fallen... The people of Duscur who still suffer persecution... The only atonement I can offer them now is to take responsibility for this broken Kingdom that has been entrusted to me. That is why I must meet with Edelgard and try to talk to her. Do you think it's a fool's errand? Honestly... I think so too."

"No, I don't think that." She murmured with a slight shake of her head. She couldn't see his expression nor him hers but they both seemed to know that they were supported. "I understand. You need to ask her about the future she's fighting for."

"Yes... For what she aims for after her domination is complete. What kind of justice she clings to ask she fights. And why she felt it necessary to start this war... I believe that asking her these things is the true responsibility I have been tasked with as king."

"Send her your message. I'm sure she will agree to meet with you." Byleth spoke with the confidence of someone who had been through this before and Dimitri gave a soft laugh at her assurance. Somehow it was comforting to him to know that Byleth had lived through this before. Her conviction gave him strength.

"You know, Beloved... When we fought in Fhirdiad, Cornelia mocked me and called me pitiful. But even if it is true that my stepmother never loved me, I am not to be pitied. After all, I have allies and dear friends who care for me. And now, I also have you by my side."

Byleth allowed herself to smile at his words, looking up at him when she felt his grip around her loosen, and eagerly returned the kiss he gave her. She knew, with this, that everything was going to be alright.


	18. Chapter 16 and a half

David was one of the new recruits that had marched to Garreg Mach under the orders of Margrave Gautier. He had lived in Faerghus all his life and knew all the rumors that were spread. He had heard about how the prince had been accused of killing his uncle, about how he fled, about how he became a demon in human form able to kill battalions of men sent to hunt him down and come out victorious. David had also heard that there was a beauty that had tamed the beast.

Of course, just because he had heard these rumors didn't mean he really believed them. There was no way a single man could take on a full battalion and survive by himself. It was also a bit of a silly thought to think that the love of a pretty woman could change a man half-mad.

They were nice stories, granted, but unrealistic.

David walked through the camp that had been set up for the night. They were marching for Enbarr and would arrive in a few days. It was bit of a scary thought that they would soon be going into battle but it was nice to think that this would be the last. The war should end after they take the Emperor's head.

It was nice that their army allowed women. It would have been too depressing to go however long without seeing or talking with the fairer sex. And if one decided to spend a little _extra_ time with him after hearing how this will be his first real battle and how he's afraid that he may die without really accomplishing anything... well, all the better.

David paused when a shining green caught his eye and he did a double take. There was a woman sitting by a fire; pretty and thin and _that chest_. Marvelous Yeah, she was the one.

He approached slowly, as if he was just meandering and not heading towards her with a goal in mind, before sliding into a seated position about an arm's length away from her. She spared him a glance and not much else. After a little consideration, David opened with a heavy sigh.

"It'll be nice... That this may be the last battle."

"Yes."

"It's funny. My first battle will be the last. I just hope... no, it's silly." David shook his head, keeping the woman in view from the corner of his eye. Once her beautiful emerald eyes focused on him he knew he had her.

"What do you consider silly?"

"I just hope that this isn't going to be _my_ last battle, you know? I'm a fresh recruit. Thought I would help my country. Only Faerghus should rule Faerghus. But... My poor mother wasn't all thta happy when I did. See, my father died and I have no siblings. I'm the only one who can carry on my family name should something happen to me."

"That _is_ a shame." The woman nodded in sympathy and David figured that it was safe enough to slide a bit closer. She was beautiful in the flicker of the campfire, her eyes seeming to glow as they caught the light, and her chest... absolutely stunning.

"Don't get me wrong. I'm happy to fight for my kingdom and country. I will gladly lay down my life to see an end to this war so that no one else will suffer. It's just a little intimidating, is all."

"It can be."

"You know, you're really nice to talk to. I was wondering if-."

"What is going on?" A third voice broke in and David froze from his subtle leaning towards the woman he was now sitting right beside. That third voice was low, cold, and held an audible growl. The soldier turned his head slowly to look towards the intimidating figure that was blocking the light from the campfire, glaring down at David with death in his eyes.

"Y-your Highness...?"

"Oh, Dimitri." The woman called out with a soft smile that lit up her face in a way that told David that the polite ones she had been giving him had been just that: polite. "This nice young man was just telling me how he's the only one that can carry on his family name and his poor mother had lost everyone else. Perhaps we should move him the back of the lines?"

"Is that so? I was thinking the_front-lines_." The future king growled but his menacing aura instantly faded when the woman held her arms out and he moved over to lift her easily and set her on his lap. He shifted his cloak so that she was effectively covered and hidden away except for her face that was surrounded by fur. David quickly stood and gave the two of them a bow.

"I'm sorry for disturbing your evening." He apologized quickly. How was he supposed to know that this beautiful woman with the amazing chest was the beauty the rumors talked about? Without a backwards glance the soldier quickly made his escape. It was a shame to lose such a _nice_ chest, though.

* * *

"He was a nice young man." Byleth laughed lightly as the obvious pout on Dimitri's face as he murmured '_I bet_' and other complaints under his breath. The man's intentions had been obvious. She had only been giving him the barest of attention but it'd been enough to raise his unwanted interest. The soldier was about to get a rude awakening if he had pressed his luck; Byleth had planned to literally knock him on his ass. She didn't need to, though, because Dimitri had appeared.

His jealousy was so plainly obvious that Byleth couldn't let the opportunity slip away. She acted nice and smiled happily as she explained the young man's plight, trying not to laugh outright when Dimitri not so subtly threated to put the man in the line of fire.

Byleth looked up at the grumpy king whose lap she currently occupied and kissed his chin; grinning when he looked down at her.

"You're still my favorite."

* * *

David was given his assignment the next day. Latrine duty for the foreseeable future. It wasn't a pretty job but at least it wasn't a death sentence. Still... that was one heck of a chest.


End file.
